Month: June 2022

We need to talk about abortion

I’m coming to you with an extra post this morning, and I’m sure you can imagine what the topic’s going to be. 

That’s right, I’m discussing the death of Roe V. Wade. 

I didn’t post anything about it over the weekend because honestly, I was just in a down place. I was angry. I’m still angry. I was scared. I’m still scared.

I’m not scared because I think I might have an unwanted pregnancy. I’m scared because a part of my body, that God gave to me, doesn’t belong to me anymore. 

Politicians get to vote on whether or not I get to make a medical decision for myself. And don’t get it twisted, an abortion is a medical decision. 

It’s also a financial decision, a family decision. A personal decision. It’s not, under any circumstances, a community decision. 

I have two messages today. The first is for anyone who wanted Roe V. Wade to be overturned. 

Most of you know that I was raised in the Church of Jesus Christ of Latter-Day Saints. Most of you also know that I’m now a Unitarian Universalist. But many lessons from my LDS upbringing have stuck with me. For instance, young LDS members are taught that when you chose the first step of a road, you also chose the last.

If you chose to force a person to have a baby when they don’t want to, you’re choosing to let people die unnecessarily in childbirth. You’re choosing to force people to bring children into this world that they are unable or unwilling to care for. You’re choosing to put unwanted babies into an already bloated adoption and foster care system. You’re choosing to increase child poverty. You’re choosing to lower women’s ability to attend college. You’re choosing to lower women’s ability to join the workforce. 

But, you might say, they chose to have sex.

So what? So because they made one decision about their bodies, they don’t get to make any more? It is absolutely none of your business. Your life will not be affected by anyone else having an abortion. 

Your life might be affected by someone’s lack of ability to get an abortion.

If you, like me, support abortion rights, here’s what I have to say to you. The fight is not over yet. We can still vote, we can still protest. 

We can still donate to protect local clinics. 

We can, and absolutely should, start getting involved in our local politics right now. Because at least for now, your right to make medical decisions about your body rests in the hands of your local representatives. Get to know who they are, and get involved. 

I’m in Pennsylvania. For now, my rights are safe. But it’s really scary to think that my ability to make medical decisions for myself can be voted on. 

On a personal note, I’m 36 years old. If I were to get pregnant, I’m at a higher risk of complications just because of my age. 36 isn’t old, but it’s old enough to start thinking about things like this. If I were to get pregnant, I would be having some serious discussions with my doctor about any risks involved. I’d be talking with the darling husband, about how a baby would affect us. Whether I could safely carry. 

Those would be hard, heavy talks. And they would be between me, my husband, and my doctor. 

And absolutely not one other person. This time last week, every person in America could say that. Today, maybe half of us can. 

Vote.

Protest.

Speak up.

Donate.

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The best books I’ve read so far in 2022

It’s almost July, which is crazy for two reasons. I can’t believe the year is almost over. I also can’t believe we’re still here as a species. 

While this year so far has been a struggle, at least my reading game’s been on point. So let’s take a moment to check out the top ten books I’ve read in 2022, so far. These are done in ascending order, but every single book on here is a must-read as far as I’m concerned. 

Shattered Bonds

By Dorothy Roberts

I read this book, and man was I in tears over it. It’s about our current situation as a country with Children Services. In particular, it’s about how Children Services seems to be specifically designed to rip apart families of color and poor families. 

It’s not an easy read. But it’s such an important one. Honestly, the only reason it’s number ten on the list is that it’s not what I’d call an enjoyable read. I didn’t have fun reading it. I did kill two highlighters making angry notes in the margins. 

City Magic

By Christopher Penczak

Since the launch of Quiet Apocalypse, I’ve been a bit more open about this specific aspect of myself. And, I think I’ve always been pretty clear that I’m only really happy living in an urban environment. This book was a must-read for me.

It’s a bit outdated, especially the parts about technology. But the vast majority was super useful and incredibly uplifting. If you have even a passing interest in witchcraft and city living, read this book. 

(Side note, do you guys want me to talk more about my witchcraft journey? Let me know if you do.)

How to be a Christian Witch

By Valerie Love

The whole concept of being a witch and still loving Jesus might seem weird until you start looking into it. Then it’s the most natural thing in the world and you start to realize that no one is more witchy than an old Catholic grandma. (Don’t say that to her, though, she’ll hit you with her broom.)

Reading this book was like getting a hug and having tea with Valerie. And I adored every moment. 

Again, if you have even a passing interest in witchcraft and also happen to be a Christian, consider checking this out.

End of Watch

By Stephen King

This was the final book in the trilogy that started with Mr. Mercedes. And it was, let me tell you, awesome. The epic story of a retired detective and a psycho with a grudge was just spectacular. It was for sure an example of a book being too short, even though it was a brick-sized hardcover. 

The Lottery

By Shirley Jackson

I finally got the nerve to read the whole short story collection that contained Jackson’s epic short, The Lottery. And I have to tell you, it was an experience.

If you want to be just soaked in 50’s vibes, while occasionally getting the shit scared out of you, you’ll love every second of this book. I spent most of my time reading this interrupting whatever the darling husband was reading because I just had to share passages with him.

I was expecting a collection of spooky little tales. I got a whole lot more. 

Savage Bounty

By Matt Wallace

Normally trilogies suffer from a book two slump. I sometimes refer to this as a bridge book. You need to read it to get to book three, but it’s not super thrilling.

Wallace managed to avoid that. 

This is the sequel to Savage Legion, which made it onto my list last year. It continues the story of a group of people, fighting a battle for the soul of their country. And let me tell you, I loved every page. 

Days of Blood and Starlight

By Laini Taylor

This is another book two in a trilogy. And I’ll be honest, it was a bit of a slouch compared to book one.

But only if we’re comparing it to book one. 

I’m going to talk more about this series since book one is the next one on the list, so let me just say that this is an epic fantasy set in modern times. And it is such a surprising and lovable journey.

Daughter of Smoke and Bone

By Laini Taylor

Book one in the series, Daughter of Smoke and Bone is the story of a girl between worlds. Raised by demons, living in the world of men, loved by an angel. She’s a part of a war she doesn’t know anything about. Until she gets pulled in. Then, she’s a real big part of it. 

I have yet to pick up a Laini Taylor book that I didn’t dive into. And the saga of Karou is no different. 

This is How You Lose the Time War

By Amal El-Mohtar and Max Gladstone

If you haven’t read this, you need to right now. 

It’s the story of two time travelers, each trying to change the timeline for the good of their side. As they go through history, making small and big changes, they start leaving each other notes.

Enemies to lovers are nothing new. But the writing, storytelling, and just overall vibe of this book are.

The notes are teasing, at first. Then they become something more. 

The next person who tells me genre fiction can’t be literary, I’m throwing a copy of this book at them. 

Hard. 

The Graveyard Book

By Neil Gaiman

If there ever comes a day when I don’t include a Gaiman book either I’ve run out of them or been body-snatched.

The Graveyard Book is technically a children’s book, but you won’t catch me giving a damn. It’s the story of a boy named Bode (short for Nobody) who’s raised by a collection of spirits in a graveyard. As he grows, he discovers that he’s being hunted by a mysterious cabal of men who call themselves Jack.

It was such a good read. And the illustrations were amazing. I loved every second of it. 

So that’s it for my list. Will any of these books still be on my end-of-year list? It’s certainly possible. Or maybe my second half of the year will blow everything out of the water. We’ll have to see. 

What about you? What are the best books you’ve read so far? Let us know in the comments so we can all share in the reading goodness. 

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The world needs us to write

This post is later than normal, sorry about that. I’ve found it hard recently to sit down and write. And trust me, it’s got nothing to do with the weather. I’m not really a Summer kind of gal. 

Rather, I’m having trouble focusing on my writing with the current state of the country. Women fighting for the rights to our bodies. Families living hand to mouth. Basic supplies are gone from our store shelves. Children were slaughtered in their classrooms. Veterans dying in the street. Yellowstone is being ripped apart by floods caused by climate change. Police still killing black people with little to no repercussions. Trans children and gay teachers are treated like predators and pedophiles.

Oh, and Flint Michigan still doesn’t have clean water. 

If Aaron Burr was watching the afterbirth of a nation, we’re watching it have a head-on collision where the airbags failed. 

And through all of this, we’re all dealing with our own struggles. 

So what in the fuck am I doing writing stories? What the fuck do I think I’m doing, talking about American Horror Story, writing about true crime stories and ghost hunters? It doesn’t matter, none of this matters! 

I’m pretty sure it was Matt Wallace on Ditch Diggers who said that it felt like he was standing outside a burning house, yelling at the people coming out, “Hey, you want to buy a book?” 

Never in my life have I felt farther from my dream of being a full-time writer. The economy has a huge impact on creative fields, it always has. And it’s a one-two punch. People don’t have the money to buy as many books, so there’s less money coming in. And everything is more expensive, so the dollars we do get aren’t going half so far. 

It’s always been hard to be a writer, but now it’s even worse. 

And now is when we need writers the most. 

Not just writers. We need musicians, visual artists, and creators of every kind. We need art more than ever in times like this. 

We need artists to talk about what they’re seeing. To give different perspectives. To show the true horrors and not let any of us forget. We need to document the horrors, write down the names, and remember those who have been lost to us. Like those who have come before us, we can hold the feckless politicians accountable. We can use words and music and paint and photos to inspire people. We can let people know they’re not going through this alone. We can be the hand on the shoulder of someone who feels isolated. 

Artists are the eyes upon those in power. 

Artists hold the names of the lost in our collective memory.

Artists give words to the grief and boiling fury of a nation. 

Like the receiver of memories, we have to suffer through the horrors and indulge in the joys of our past to guide people into a better future. 

Some of us aren’t going to be able to do that. I can’t fight this fight all day, every day. I’ll never make it. So I’m also going to create silly things. The stories and podcasts and poems that have nothing to do with the horrors we’re facing. And I hope you do, too.

Because as much as we need the record keepers and fighters, we need the stories too. 

We need things that distract us. That makes us laugh and smile and just forget about everything wrong for a bit. While I’m not one to turn off the news, I am one to take a break from the news and watch the latest Are You Scared. (Shane, Ryan and Stephen started a company in the middle of a pandemic. Clearly, they’re not scared of anything.) 

I’ve carried books to ER waiting rooms. Played video games when I was having an anxiety attack. Watched my favorite movies when I’ve felt alone. Listened to music when there was no other way I could find my way out of the darkness. 

I thought that was great on the last season of Stranger Things, by the way. Metaphorically, we’ve all been where Max was, lost in a dark place where no one can reach us, only to have music light our way back.

Which brings me to my final point. 

My favorite stories include ordinary people finding that they have extraordinary strength within them. A strength that allows them to defeat the bad guys, save their loved ones and find peace in their world. While not everything turns out perfect, things get better. There’s a happy ending.

The Baudelaire find their safe place. 

The House Next Door comes down.

The Owens sisters break the curse. 

Coraline saves her parents. 

And in reading their stories, we fight with them. We learn that we can lose but then win again. 

So please, don’t stop creating. If you’ve always wanted to create but haven’t started yet, start now. 

We have so much work to do.

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Why we all know the names Ed and Lorraine Warren

If you have even a passing interest in the occult, the horror genre, or even popular culture, you know the names Ed and Lorraine Warren. Ed was a demonologist and ordained exorcist by the Catholic church. Lorraine was a psychic medium. Together, they worked on countless paranormal investigations and founded the New England Society for Psychic Research. 

Their work inspired some of the most popular horror movies of my lifetime. They investigated the Amityville House, Annabelle, the Perron family, and countless others. 

Throughout their lives, they faced plenty of backlash. They were called frauds, of course they were. And I’m not here to say that the work they did is real. I’m also not here to say it’s not real. What I can say is this. Some questions are unanswered either way you see things. But I’ve seen too much in my own life to discount that there might be at least a grain of truth.

As I said though, that’s not the point. The point is that we cannot stop talking about them. And I’m here to talk about why.

It would be easy to say it’s the popular films based on their work that have put the Warrens firmly in our pop culture. But that doesn’t answer the base question. Why are these films so popular to start with? Well, for the same reason the Warrens themselves are.

To start with, Ed and Lorraine are attainable heroes. They’re not superpowered. They’re not sharpshooters or assassins trained from childhood to kill. While you could argue that Lorraine is a medium, lots of people consider that a skill you can learn. So while we might have a hard time seeing ourselves in Black Widow or Captain America, we can easily see ourselves in Ed and Lorraine. 

And we want to see ourselves there, too. Because the stories they tell are inspiring. The family in Amityville survived a living hell, as did the Perrons. The nurse who owned Annabelle was freed of her. The Warrens went up against the forces of Hell itself, and more often than not, they won.

Finally, The Warrens continue to be popular because they were fighting against fears we all have. 

I’m not saying that we all fear having a demonic presence in our home. But we’re all a little afraid of something coming into our home that might hurt us. We’re afraid of a good deal, often. The house that seems too cheap is often cursed with a bad foundation or a leaking roof. The lovely doll we got at a second-hand store is carrying lice or its stitching is falling apart. 

To a lesser extent, I think we’re all afraid of mental illness. And demonic possession can be seen as a metaphor for mental illness. 

There are those among us who want to do horrible things. They want to poison aspirin, shoot up elementary schools, lure people into dark places and slaughter them. All of this points to a broken, sad mind. And often we don’t get satisfying answers to why these people did what they did.

It’s really hard to see the humanity in the hands of the man holding the gun. And yet often, so often, we hear from friends and family members. They say that these monsters in man’s form were not monsters. Of course, they weren’t. We hear the same thing about most serial killers. They were nice people, good people.

Until they weren’t.

It’s easy to see how someone might suspect a demonic force at play. Maybe, it’s even better that way. Who wants to think a human being could do something like that.

I hope you’ve enjoyed this look into Ed and Lorraine Warren. And I want to hear what you think about them? Do you love them, hate them? Let us know in the comments.

Paper Beats World is a labor of love. If you can, please consider buying me a cup of coffee on Ko-fi

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7 things I learned publishing 10 books

Quiet Apocalypse came out last month, and I’m maybe more excited about it than any other launch I’ve ever had. Except maybe the first one.

Why was this so exciting?

Because Quiet Apocalypse is my tenth published book.

That’s not even including the three short story collections I put out. Or the first season of my radio drama, AA.

I’m a firm believer that the best way to learn is by doing. And I’ve learned a hell of a lot doing this job for as long as I have. So today I want to share this hard-won wisdom I have earned. (Yes, I’m still obsessed with Hamilton.) Here then are <?> things I’ve learned after writing ten books. 

A writing career is a long game. 

With so much content out, you might imagine I’ve quit my day job and am writing full time. Unless you’ve been reading this blog for a while, then you know that I still have a more than full-time job. I also write for Haunted MTL. 

What I’m saying is, you’re not going to get rich quick writing books. You’re probably not going to get rich at all. I mean, it’s possible. But just not likely.

I think that I’ll be able to go full-time eventually. It’s just going to take more work than what I’ve done so far.

Writing is 75% of the battle

Most of what I do as a writer is, well, writing. Blog posts, novels, short stories, podcast scripts. Quirky little micro-fiction pieces and snarky social media posts also count as far as I’m concerned. 

Then, there’s all the other stuff I do. I submit stories, and plan and act out marketing. I run ad campaigns and do market research. I’m also exploring whether or not I could produce my own audiobooks. (Would you guys like audio versions of my books? Let me know in the comments.) I make book covers for my indie books. I schedule for them to be edited. I pay for them to be edited. There is so much involved in writing that isn’t writing.

So much.

Indie and Trad publishing have a lot more in common than I thought. 

I had a lot of assumptions going into publishing with a company instead of on my own. And maybe if you’re working with one of the bigger companies, some of my assumptions might be true. But working with an indie publisher, well it’s a lot like self-publishing your work. What my publisher did for me was to make a cover and do editing. The bulk of marketing still fell on my shoulders.

That’s the biggest surprise I had. No one is going to market your book for you but you. You’ve got to get the word out on social media. You’ve got to send out press releases, and schedule author meetups. You’ve got to let the world know your book is out and why they should give a damn. Because literally, no one else is going to do it.

Social media doesn’t count for as much as you think it does. 

I like social media (because I’m real fast with that block button.) I like talking on Twitter and sharing pictures on Instagram. And these are some ways to let people know your book is available.

But they’re not the most reliable ways. You can never be sure that anyone is seeing what you’re posting. And even if they are, they’re not going to be as compelled to buy your book as you want them to be. 

I’ve seen a steady increase over the years of social media followers and readership of PBW. And I love that! I am so happy that you’re all here. 

But my sales numbers have not gone up with those social media numbers. And that’s fine, I’m not complaining. I am saying that worrying over your Instagram followers isn’t going to do you as much good as you think it will.

The cover counts for so, so much. 

I have made my covers for my indie books in the past. Quiet Apocalypse will likely be the last book I do a cover for. Because having a professional cover counts for so much. People scrolling through books online are going to notice covers first. Then they’ll slow down and read your descriptions. But it’s the cover that’s going to sell your book first. So invest in a good one.

You will never, ever stop learning. 

I’m a pretty good writer, but I hope I’m always striving to be a better writer. I’ve got a ton to learn about marketing still if I’m being honest. And I’ll always, always have more to learn.

There’s always a convention to go to, a new book to read, a new writing practice to try. There’s always a better way to pitch, to write a fight scene, to tell people about your book. There’s always more to learn about the market and trends. There are always ways to be a better writer. And so long as you have that sort of mindset, you’ll keep getting better.

It’s still worth it. 

After all this time, after publishing ten books and still needing a full-time job, I still love it.

I still love writing. I still love sharing my work with other people. Writing Quiet Apocalypse was so much fun, and writing my current WIP (AA season two if you’re wondering) is even more fun than that. I said a long time ago that I’d still want to write if I never made a dime. And that is still the case.

I’m so proud of my books. And I fully expect to reach number twenty someday. 

And then I’ll just keep going. 

Paper Beats World is a labor of love. If you’d like to support us, you can do so on Ko-fi.

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