You should read I’m Glad My Mom Died

Usually, when I talk about a book here on Paper Beats World, it isn’t really a book review. It’s a review of what we, as authors, can learn from books. And I love doing that. Trust me, I’m not going to stop doing that.

However, there are books I want to talk about just for the story itself. Or, if I think it’s just a good book that more people need to hear about. So, sometimes I’m going to just talk about books I think you should read, and why I think you should read them.

Today, we’re going to talk about Jennette McCurdy’s memoir, I’m Glad My Mom Died. If you’re not already familiar, McCurdy is best known for her work as Sam on the shows iCarly and Sam and Cat.

Those shows were a fair bit after my time of Nickelodeon watching, though I have a few younger relatives that watched them. Enough that the damned theme song got stuck in my head more than once while listening to this book.

The audio version is read by Jennette, by the way. After listening to it, I think this is the superior way to experience the story. At least, if you want your heart to be ripped the whole way out of your chest.

As you can imagine, the book is about Jenette’s childhood. Or lack thereof, if we’re being honest. It was a dark, lonely, chaotic childhood. After reading it, I’m glad her mom died too.

You should read I’m Glad My Mom Died if-.

If you’re a former Mormon

I don’t know if Jennette’s still a member of the Church of Jesus Christ of Latter-day Saints. But she was raised in the church. In case you don’t remember, I was also raised in the church.

Actually, Jennette’s one of the few people I’ve ever heard of who experienced Mormonism in the same way I did. Let me explain.

Most people who are Mormon are very devout. It’s a high-control religion. You don’t miss church. And church is an all-Sunday event. I went to Church every Sunday with my grandma. I went to Young Women’s group on Wednesdays and Girls’ Camp in the Summer. There were Temple Trips and conferences. It’s a whole thing that everyone in the family is supposed to participate in.

My mother was not involved. She wasn’t a member of Relief Society. She constantly ignored the Word of Wisdom, drinking coffee and smoking. We always had caffeinated soda in the house, which was not allowed before Mitt Romney was caught sipping a Pepsi on the campaign trail. She was, for all intents and purposes, a non-practicing Mormon.

The same can be said of Jennette’s family. They went to church sometimes. They don’t seem to follow the Word of Wisdom. Her mother went frequently and got blessings from Priesthood Holders when she was battling cancer. But her consideration for church waned when she got healthy, and her daughter started her acting career. This leaves Jennette with a sort of religious psychosis that feels very familiar to me. The way she describes the Still Small Voice basically giving her OCD feels very, horrifyingly, familiar.

If your parents had mental illnesses

I don’t want to armchair diagnose anyone, but it’s pretty clear that Jennette’s mom was suffering from some mental issues.

I mean, I think anyone who forces their kids into acting has an issue. But this is something different.

Through the book, Jennette talks about her mom physically threatening her dad with a knife. She talks about her insisting on showering her children well into their teenage years. About how her mom essentially starved herself and still thought she was fat. How their house was a hoarder’s house, with rooms so full of things that they couldn’t even be used, and everyone slept on mats in the living room.

These are things that are hard for a child to understand. Even harder to experience. Why don’t they have a room like their friends? Why can’t they go to school? Why can’t they have a damned shower alone like a normal person?

It’s bleak. And if you lived through that, this book might make you feel less alone.

If you’ve suffered through an eating disorder

This was one of the hardest parts of I’m Glad My Mom Died.

Because her mom was obsessed with her body, and her desire to keep her thin and looking childlike for as long as possible, Jennette started calorie counting at a very young age.

This led to years of different eating disorders. Anorexia turned into Bulimia. I hated hearing this. I hated thinking of the young woman who played such a vibrant, confident character hating herself.

This is another situation that can feel isolating. Even though way too many people suffer from an eating disorder in America. Jennette tries to handle it herself. Then she talks to a therapist. But the first therapist doesn’t work for her. And it takes her a long time to find another one.

There’s a lesson here, though. So long as you’re still breathing, you can keep trying. If you’re currently suffering through an eating disorder, keep trying. Find the help you need. Try again. You’re loved; you deserve to eat and fuel your body. You deserve to stick around.

If you were personally horrified by Quiet On The Set

I mentioned earlier that I didn’t watch iCarly as a child.

I did watch All That, though. And a host of other shows that brightened some dark days.

I was kind of an indoor kid.

Realizing the abuse of the kids involved made me want to puke. It also made me want to do some things to some people in Hollywood that, for legal reasons, I shouldn’t type.

Jennette was part of that. Her co-stars were part of that. No kid should ever have to suffer through that sort of abuse. And yeah, I feel guilty because I was one of millions of kids who watched that show and made money for the abusers.

We aren’t to blame. We were just kids ourselves. But we owe it to these actors to understand what happened and do what we can to make sure it doesn’t happen again. I don’t like parasocial relationships, but I do think we can all do our part. For starters, be nice to child actors on social media and remember that they’re kids.

If your parents ever crushed your dreams, but you got them back.

As I mentioned before, I listened to I’m Glad My Mom Died. I did that for the most part in my kitchen while cleaning up or cooking. And since the weather’s started to cool, some of that time I had my windows open.

So my neighbors got to hear me actively cussing out Jennette’s mom.

As a child, Jennette wrote a screenplay. Maybe it was good, maybe it wasn’t. That doesn’t matter. She was a little kid, and she wrote a little screenplay. That’s great!

When she brought it to her mom, her mom was disappointed. She wanted Jennette to be focusing on her acting career. This line’s going to stick with me. Jennette’s mom told her. “You have a cute little peach butt. I hate to think of you getting a writer’s watermelon butt.”

Bitch, who do you think writes all these shows and movies for actors with their peach butts to be on?

My personal feelings aside, I hate the thought of a child having their dreams shot down by the adults in their lives. Most of the time it’s done out of misguided love. A desire to protect kids from the harsh realities of most creative careers.

And yeah, the reality is harsh. I sure as hell don’t make enough money to live on from my writing.

But that’s not the damned point! The point is that the kid had a passion. And if she’d taken all the time and energy she was committing to acting (which she didn’t want to do) and put that towards writing, she might have more than two books out by now!

That’s honestly the biggest takeaway from I’m Glad My Mom Died. And it’s why I really think you should read it. Jennette went through Hell. But she healed. It took years. It took hard work, and I’m sure it still takes hard work to this day. But she healed, and she got back to writing. She got back to herself. And we can too.

If you haven’t already, you should read I’m Glad My Mom Died. It’s dark, unflinchingly honest, and damned inspiring.

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