Tag: Writing

The weight of a woman’s pen

“I’m a writer. I don’t cook and I don’t clean.” Dorothy West.

When I was a kid, my grandmother had a hysterectomy. I don’t mean when I was a teenager. I mean when I was a kid, like ten. And my mother sent me to stay with her for a week during my Summer vacation to take care of her. When my mother had a hysterectomy a few years later, I took care of her, too.

My writing has always come after caring for someone or something. I’ve written while potatoes boiled, at laundromats, while in doctors’ waiting rooms and on the public bus. I’ve gotten up early to sneak in writing before anyone would need me.

I have always had weight on my pen. Weight that many women probably find quite familiar.

This won’t be news to most of you, but women’s aspirations are often put on the back burner. We work our passions while babies nap, while water boils and meatloaves bake. We are often the default caregivers of children, parents, and in-laws. So if we are to write, we’ll do so once everything else is done.

This happens to me all the time. As you might know, my Darling Husband had a stroke about a year and a half ago. He is physically and mentally disabled. He needs care, some days more than others. So writing often comes in stolen moments. I barely wrote the first year after his stroke; I just didn’t have the time or energy.

Men don’t seem to have this problem. Or, I should say, men are less likely to have this problem. Lots of modern men are good at this. If you’re a man and you do an equal share of the housework, make your own doctor’s appointments, take equal care of your kids and elderly relatives, and pick up after your damned self without needing a list, that’s awesome. You’re a competent adult, and we love to see it. I’m kind of assuming that if you’re a man and you’re reading this, you are in fact one of these competent adults because I generally assume my readers are wonderful people and I love you all.

Let me tell you, though, that is not always the case.

One of the most galling things about the division of homecare is hearing some (not all) creative men talk about their partners. And, I hate to say it, but the first one that comes to mind is my man, my hero, Stephen King.

In his book, On Writing, he talks about his wife, Tabitha. And he obviously adores her. He makes it clear that he was only able to write while they had three little kids and they were both working because she was picking up the slack around the house. However, he points out that she had writing aspirations as well.

Well, fuck that! Tabitha King is an author. She’s been a published author since goddamned 1981 when her novel Small World came out. And I only found that out literally five minutes before writing this sentence because I looked it up! She’s published eight novels! On Writing came out in 2000, at which point Tabitha had already published seven of her books. And he sure didn’t mention that!

Stephen wrote novel after novel while working full time and doing a shit ton of coke. She wrote novel after novel while working, raising children, caring for a house, and dealing with her coke-addicted husband. Not to mention being incredibly supportive of his career. Put some respect on her damned name!

Over and over I hear men in the writing field talk about how much they depend on their spouses so they can write. I don’t often hear women say the same thing. Yes, some husbands fit that supporting role. But more often you hear men talk affectionately about how much their wives support them, without sparing a thought for how they can support their wives back.

Even so, the weight on the modern woman’s pen isn’t as heavy as it used to be. Consider Shirley Jackson, one of the greatest horror writers of all time. We all know the sort of marriage she had. Imagine what she might have done if her pen were a little lighter. If she’d had someone to cook dinner and look after the children. What might we have seen from other famous women writers? How many more amazing works would we have if women didn’t have this extra pressure on their time?

This needs to stop. This pressure needs to be removed. We need our pens to be lighter. But if that’s to happen, we women need to start having some real conversations with our partners, and with each other. In that spirit, I want to speak directly to my fellow women right now.

If your partner isn’t sharing in domestic labor, it might be time to have a real conversation with them. That’s going to look different for every couple. But it’s better than doing all the work and growing resentful that your own dreams are being buried under laundry and vacuuming.

We also need to stop posting these dumb, weaponized incompetent videos of men. It just encourages other women to put up with bad behavior because ‘all men are like that’. The fuck they are. My husband is half paralyzed, and he still helps out around the house to the best of his ability. My roommate is twenty-four, and he does equal parts of the housework.

Now, let’s also talk about how we talk to and about ourselves and each other. We do not have to have perfectly clean houses. We don’t have to make meals from scratch every night. We don’t have to have everyone over for holidays, cook, clean, and be perfect hostesses. We can ask for help from our families. We don’t have to take care of everyone. We shouldn’t expect perfection from ourselves. And if you have friends or family members who expect that perfection from you, maybe that’s not your problem. Maybe it’s time to respectfully tell your mom, sister-in-law, or judgy friend to go to hell.

This is something I’ve really struggled with. Especially since my husband’s stroke.

This is about to get real real here, so please be kind.

For the first few months after my husband’s stroke, I barely slept, let alone wrote. He needed almost constant care. He couldn’t sit up, couldn’t feed or clean himself. I didn’t leave the house for more than fifteen minutes for months. I was scared to take a shower with the door closed. I was terrified to leave him alone.

People offered to help. To sit with him. To run errands for me. And I would just say that I was fine. I had it covered. Because I did have the necessary things covered. He was clean, fed, and cared for. The house was put together.

But I wasn’t writing. Hell, I wasn’t reading. I could barely let him out of my sight.

Then, I did something drastic. A friend needed a roommate. I needed help. So we moved in together. I let other people stay with my husband. I let other people cook and clean. We’re talking about hiring a housekeeper. I stopped doing every single thing for my husband, and only stepped in when he actually needed help.

More than all of that, I’ve come to accept that the house might just be a mess. And that’s okay. It’s not a moral failing. Right now as I write this, there’s a massive pile of clothes that need to be folded and put away. There are dishes in my sink. The lawn needs mowed. I’ll get to it, or someone will. My writing comes first.

It’s time to take some weight off our pens and see what we can really do.

Paper Beats World is a labor of love. You can support us by liking this post, sharing it and commenting. You can also support us on Ko-fi.

Station 86 Volume 1 is coming! You can get your very own copy on October Second.

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Station 86, the physical book!

Earlier this year, Grady Hendrix announced that he wasn’t coming out with a new book until 2027. As he usually graces us with a book a year, this bothered him. So, he published a novella under a pen name across the pond. That novella is called The Rednexorcist, published under the name Frank Sloane.

Yes, I ordered a copy. Yes, I’ll be reviewing it on Weird Wyrlds. (And by the way, I just reviewed Dead But Dreaming of Electric Sheep by Paul Tremblay. It’s a fun review, and a very fun book.)

I don’t have a novella to publish. I don’t have a novella written right now. And while I could write one, this would only delay the launch of the book I’m writing right now. And since I’m still working on the rough draft, I don’t really care to delay it any more.

Instead, I’m doing this. I’m launching Station 86 in physical form for the first time.

Now, I love a good physical book. My overly burdened bookshelves will tell you that. But Station 86 has always been, except for book five, a collection of novellas. So, of course I didn’t want to ask you all to buy a novella for physical book money. So, I’m putting them together. Seeming and You Can’t Trust The AI are coming out in Volume 1 on October second. Volume 2, which will include Virus and Station Central, will come out in February of 2027.

(Unrelated spoiler: that might not be the only release in 2027. Stay tuned.)

Eventually I hope to release an audiobook version as well. But I might need to get Kickstarter involved with that one, since I will not be using AI and will hire a voice actor.

I want to thank all of you for sticking around while I write new books. And while my posts have been super late. This year has been busy as hell, launching a new site and helping the Darling Husband recover from his stroke. But so far, it’s been a decent ride.

Stay tuned.

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Why I’ll probably never run out of content

This month marks the twelfth anniversary of Paper Beats World. Don’t worry, this isn’t going to be some long emotional nostalgic post that I cry while I write. That’ll be later this month. Today, I want to acknowledge something that is kind of my super power. It’s something I aspired to as a child, and I think I’ve achieved it.

I have yet to run out of content for this blog. And honestly, I don’t think I ever will. I also don’t think I’ll ever run out of ideas for books or short stories. I have rarely, if ever, looked at a blank page for long.

Did you ever read the mystery series The Cat Who by Lillian Jackson Braun? The main character, Jim Qwilleran, was a journalist. He prided himself on being able to write 1,000 words about anything. Reading these books as a kid (yes, I did have a weird childhood), I decided that’s something I wanted to be able to do, too.

More than that, though, I have a crippling fear of running out of things to say. But it turns out this isn’t a superpower anymore than writing is. It’s a skill, and it can be learned.

So here are the things I do to make sure I never run out of ideas. Some of them are actionable; you can start doing them today. Some are a bit more philosophical. Try one of them, try any of them, try all of them. See what ideas you come up with.

I write everything down

I’m one of those people who always has a notebook with me. And I write things down. Things that I notice, that are interesting or infuriating. Thoughts I have while reading, or riding the bus. I never assume I’m going to remember, because I can promise you I won’t.

My notes are never pretty. They are not usually very interesting. They probably wouldn’t make sense to anyone but me. But they often lead to observations that are later made into stories or blog posts.

I freewrite

Yes, I’m banging this drum again. Freewriting is the number one best thing you can do for your writing. It’s often in these unstructured times when I come up with some of my best ideas. Sometimes it’s a fix for a problem in my current novel. Sometimes it’s a brand new story idea or some revelation I want to explore more in a post. Sometimes it’s some deep emotional realization, but that’s another post for another time. The point is that there are often good things to be gained from letting your brain off the leash.

I hang out with people older and younger than me

My roommate is a Gen Z person. He helps me keep an eye on what younger generations are up to these days. I also talk to a lot of older people in my day job.

This is a gift. Different generations see the world through entirely different eyes. I learn things from people both older and younger than me all the time. And this leads me to realizations and lessons I’d have missed if I was only hanging out with people my own age.

For a while, I struggled learning things from people younger than me. I had a bit of a chip on my shoulder. I think that came from not feeling as though I’d established myself yet. I didn’t feel like I’d shown the world what I could do. Now that I’m 40, and consider myself to have at least a little bit of success, I’ve humbled my damn self a lot. And that’s only benefited me.

I keep up with the news

To a point. If I didn’t put some barriers on how much and how often I pay attention to world affairs, I might have taken a bath with a toaster by this point. But I do pay attention.

The state of the world makes me angry. It makes me scared. And it gives me things to write about.

Art imitates life. If you’re an artist, it’s your job to capture part of the world you live in and explain it in your art. There will be history books later that will give us facts and figures (and death counts). We are here to tell later generations what it was like to live these days. What it’s like to wake up, go to work, go grocery shopping, do the laundry and wash the dishes while ICE agents are kidnapping people and our ‘president’ is stealing everything not nailed down and picking fights with other countries like a drunk after happy hour.

I consume things that cause a spark in me

I watch a lot of YouTube. A lot of writing content, of course, and horror content. I love me a good three-hour-long deep dive into urban legends. But I also watch things that just catch my interest. I like watching Answers With Joe, for instance. I like Mickey Adkins, a therapist. I also like this woman who’s a mortician. And I’ve been following the manager of a legal brothel on Instagram for forever.

Interesting things are interesting. And a writer can be inspired by another shiny thing that catches our eye. We’re kind of like cats. Or people with undiagnosed ADHD.

I love learning about new things. Useless things that I will never have to know, but are fascinating. These all feed into my writing. And, frankly, my overall enjoyment of life.

I live

I am forty years old, and I have seen things. I have done things. I have experienced good and bad days. I go on trips, go to the doctor, cook food, and sing along to music in my kitchen. I watch good TV, listen to new music, and investigate new hobbies. I have endured horrors. I have lost people who were my entire world. I have met new people who stole away my heart. And I am always eager to experience something new. Preferably good ones, but we can’t always be so lucky.

Writers cannot write in a vacuum. Many of us fantasize about quitting our jobs and going on writing retreats. I’m tempted to say that if I didn’t have quite such a full life, I might write more. These posts might be on time more often, and I might publish more than one book a year.

But I don’t think I would. I think that if I shut off that valve of living, it would strangle the creative valve. Writing doesn’t come from just pure imagination. It comes from experiencing life. All the great, glorious, and gory moments together. Every tear I shed has worked its way onto the page. Every love, every laugh. My work is an amalgamation of things that scare and delight me. If we’re honest, I think we’re all like that.

So that’s it. That’s how I’ve yet to run out of content, and probably never will. Now, it’s your turn. What do you do to come up with ideas? Let us know in the comments.

Paper Beats World is a labor of love. You can support us by liking this post, sharing it and commenting. You can also support us on Ko-fi.

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So, 250 years

Tomorrow is the 4th of July. And, as I’m sure you’ve noticed, it’s America’s 250th birthday. And our girl is looking rough. Almost as rough as the front lawn of the White House right now.

You already know that I’m a pretty liberal person. I hate the current administration and just about everything it’s doing. I’m a bisexual woman and witch. To be completly frank, I think we’re just a short goosestep away from facisim. And if you feel like I feel, celebrating Independence Day probably feels gross right now.

At least, that’s how I was feeling. But, here’s the problem with that. I am an American. I carry the New England ocean in my eyes and the Appalachian dirt under my fingernails. I am an American. And I am proud to be an American.

Not in a ‘Murica, love it or leave it sort of way. More in a ‘We The People’ sort of way.

I am proud of us. Our people, and our history of civil disobedience.

I grew up hearing stories about Vietnam protests. I was a kid when I first learned of the Kent State shootings. I was baffled by the thought of college students being murdered for protesting. Weren’t we supposed to protest? Wasn’t that part of what it was to be American?

It is, in fact, part of what makes us American. And I’m damn proud of that.

I’m proud of the brave protestors at the Stonewall riots. I’m proud of the people in Minnesota who protested against ICE and protected their neighbors. I’m proud of every single person on college campuses protesting the ongoing war in Gaza.

We are protestors. We always have been. We started this country by throwing tea in a harbour. And that patriot spirit lives on in us.

I am proud most of all of our writers. We have produced some of the most amazing writers the world has ever known. Some have been protestors as well, and some have just written honestly and deeply about how they’ve seen the world. Maya Angelou, Nellie Bly, Shirley Jackson, Lois Lowrey. Charles Ortleb, who founded The New York Native. Modern authors like Tananarive Due who remind us of our past. Authors like Upton Sinclair and Thomas Bell, who wrote about the horrors around them unflinchingly. There are a thousand more I’m forgetting, a thousand more I don’t even know about, and a thousand after that who are just getting started.

We can’t really love something unless we see it. All of it. I am well aware of our shared history. Of all the blood spilled on this land. I live on land originally inhabited by the native Lanape tribe. I live on land where there were bloody battles and Residential Schools. I live where people have been worked to death to rip coal from the ground.

But I also live where people have fought for freedom. Where we’ve aspired to mighty ideals that we haven’t yet reached. Where we stand up for our neighbors. And I’m proud to be an American. I am proud of my fellow Americans, not some false dream of pink houses.

So if you’re like me, and you’ve had a hard time feeling patriotic, here’s what I suggest. Do something patriotic. Stand up for your neighbors. Stand up for the immigrant, the LGBTQ+ community. Protect people of color. Protest when you can, however you can. Find joy in the little moments, even in these dark days. Visit your library, take food to your food bank. Shop small. And vote! For God’s sake, vote.

Happy Independence Day. Let Freedom live in your heart and show in your actions. Let’s work together to build a country we can all be proud of. Hopefully it won’t take us another 250 years to do it.

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The lost experience of shared TV

On May 21st 2026, CBS aired the last episode of their historical late-night talk show, The Late Show. First hosted by David Letterman from 1993 until 2015, the show was taken over by Stephen Colbert from then until, well, last Thursday.

I didn’t watch this historical moment when it aired. I watched it on YouTube earlier today, because I generally stream TV shows the next day instead of watching them when they’re aired. I have work in the morning, after all. Most of us have work in the morning. About the only thing I watch live anymore is sporting events, because it’s impossible to avoid spoilers for something like that, and watching a game isn’t fun if you know who’s going to win.

(Congratulations, by the way, to the PWHL Victoire on winning their first Walter Cup.)

I know that I’m not alone in this. Most people my age and younger don’t watch anything live. And if you are younger than me, born after the time when live TV was the only option and cable was for rich people, that might be hard to comprehend. To watch anything, you had to be at home in front of your TV at a certain time. If you had to go to the bathroom or grab a snack, you had to do it during the commercial break. There was no rewinding or pausing. If you missed something, you missed it until that episode was rerun or you bought it on VHS or DVD. If someone else in the house wanted to watch a different program on a different channel at the same time, you had to either have two TVs or have a fight.

This change in how people watch television is one excuse CBS gave for cancelling The Late Show. It’s not financially viable anymore, they claim. As though somehow they make less money on streaming ad revenu as on cable ad revenue. Come on with that, CBS, who do you think you’re fooling? We all know why you did this, you wretched cowards.

That being said, streaming television is a different experience from watching programs live. As writers, we owe it to ourselves to understand the shifting mediums in which people consume content and stories. First, let’s look at what we’re losing as live TV watching goes by the wayside.

Watching live TV requires us to be present. Not trying to do two things at once. Not scrolling social media. We had to be there when it was on.

There are issues with that, I know. And we’ll get to those in a moment. But it’s hard not to think back nostalgically about a time when, if we wanted to see our favorite show, we had to stop whatever else we were doing.

We had to stop.

Live TV events brought people together in a way that’s hard to explain if you haven’t experienced it. Yes, I remember where I was on September 11th. I remember where I was when I found out Trump was elected. But I also remember good things!

I remember watching the last episode of Friends with my mom, and 52.5 million other people. I remember watching the first Who Shot MR. Burns episode in May of 1995, and having to wait until September to find out. (Yes, I was watching The Simpsons at age nine. Weren’t you?)

This isn’t unique. Actually, the Friends finale audience is laughably small when compared to the number of people who watched the last episode of M.A.S.H in February of 1983. 121.6 million people tuned in for that. I bet if you ask someone who was around during that time, they’ll tell you about watching it.

These touchstone moments are significant. These are moments when massive amounts of people cared so much about a story, about a fictional world full of fictional characters that people poured their creativity and passion into creating, that they all had to see how it ended.

Imagine writing something that was that significant to that many people. And for those of you who hadn’t experienced this, imagine the significance of experiencing a story that so many other people are experiencing at the same time.

All that being said, I don’t want to be the old woman yelling at clouds here. I am more than aware that streaming content is the default now for a reason. As exciting as it is to experience television as a group, it’s far more accessible for far more people. Life is not so busy that we can’t take an hour to enjoy a good story. But that hour we can take is going to be a different hour for all of us. I can’t stay up until 11:00 to watch American Horror Story on a work night. I can’t plan dinner and chores around TV watching. And, if I might put my feminist hat on for a moment, there’s about half the population that doesn’t have the ability to just stop cooking, taking care of babies, and running a household to watch TV when it’s airing.

Life happens. People get sick, have to work late, get busy, get invited on dates, and go on vacations. Life doesn’t just stop, and in fairness, it shouldn’t. Personally, this is one reason why I consider books to be the superior way to consume stories. I might always have time to sit down and watch a show. But I can usually sneak in some reading time or listen to an audiobook.

Speaking of books, I actually love how advanced storytelling has become on television. I’ve always felt that people who look down on television as a storytelling medium are missing the point. Stories are stories. But, television shows that adhere to traditional airing time constraints run into problems. Stories had to fit neatly into twenty-two or forty-five minutes, give time for commercial breaks, and fit into specific season lengths. Shows had to add filler episodes, bottle episodes, and even clip shows. A great example of this is X-Files. You had ‘moster of the week’ episodes, and storyline episodes. And God help you if you missed a storyline episode. You’d better hope they re-run it, or that a friend was good at remembering details.

But with those constraints taken away, storytelling can fit into the size and space it needs. Consider shows like The Boys or Stranger Things. These shows were designed for streaming platforms. The episode lengths vary based on storytelling needs and not advertisers’ schedules. They also do away with filler episodes. Every episode is essential to the plot. And they can do that because it’s almost impossible to miss an episode.

So what’s the takeaway here? Are we losing more than we’re giving up? Well, as nostalgic as I am, I don’t know that we’re losing more than we’re gaining. I think the more ways we can share stories, the better. And while my nostalgic little Millennial heart might pine for a big TV show experience, I think the ability to fit stories into the little peaceful moments we have through our days is incredibly beneficial. Assuming that everyone can watch TV at the same time is assuming that we all have the same sorts of days. And that’s not true now, nor has it ever been. Streaming content evens out the game. Just because we can’t all play at the same time doesn’t mean we shouldn’t all get a chance to play.

But this is all just my opinion. I’d love to hear your thoughts on it. Is there a big TV moment you remember? Let us know in the comments.

Paper Beats World is a labor of love. You can support us by liking this post, sharing it and commenting. You can also support us on Ko-fi.

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In defense of fanfic

In March, I wrote a post about writers being self-indulgent in their writing. It was inspired, let’s say, by a post from a rather popular Booktuber who I won’t be naming. Suffice to say, I don’t watch her and only found out about the dreck she was spouting through the endlessly educational and uplifting Micky Adkins.

At the time, I mentioned that this very long video actually inspired two blog post ideas. Along with several furious rants, only heard by the people in my house who can’t escape me. I am nothing if not a woman of my word, and I am here today with part two.

Click here if you want to read part one of this conversation.

I did mention before that I am not out to shame the original booktuber. And I want to repeat this. We, as a writing community, do not need to tear each other down. I just happen to disagree vehemently with the argument that this person is making, and I want to offer a rebuttal.

Today, we’re going to talk about fanfiction and why I personally think it’s a great way to learn to write.

Fanfic is the closest thing we can get to an apprenticeship in fictional writing

Consider the apprenticeship. What does an apprentice do? They follow around their teacher, learning their style and technique. They learn the basics of a craft bit by bit, with a learned elder by their side.

When we write fan fiction, we are doing something similar. We are not coming to a blank page with nothing to fill it. We have a set world. A series of parameters. We’re not building something from scratch, but building onto something that already exists.

Through this, we start to learn the fundamentals of writing that are never taught in English classes. Character interactions, pacing, and dialogue. These are all valid skills that can be taught when writing fanfic.

Now, I will say that some skills can’t be taught this way. The biggest example of course is world-building. The world’s already been built, after all. The characters have already been created for you, unless you’re adding a character of your own creation. But there are other ways to learn world-building. And that’s another skill you can master in addition to what you’re learning by writing fanfic.

It encourages creativity

Writing fan fiction can turn a passive experience like watching a movie or reading a book into an active, creative exercise. It becomes a game.

Let’s use Lord of The Rings as an example. Because God knows there’s a metric ton of fanfiction about LOTR. So you’re watching Return of The King for, if we’re being honest, the twentieth time. And you start thinking about a character you made up to fit in this world. What are they doing in this scene? Who are they talking to? How are they fighting? Would their special skill wrap something up here, or are they completely useless right now? How are they feeling about the person who’s bleeding out right now?

These are writer questions. These are character-building questions. When you’re writing any scene, you do have to think about how every individual character is responding to the action or conversation at hand, even if they aren’t the main character. And this is a great way to sneak in a little practice during family movie night.

Sometimes you can end up writing those characters for real

I was recently obsessed with a book called The End of The World As We Know It. It is a collection of short stories set in the world of Stephen King’s The Stand. As a writer, I’m insanely jealous that I didn’t get to participate. As a reader, I’m insanely grateful that the book exists.

You can read my full review on Weird Wyrlds.

But guess what. That’s fanfic. That’s fans of King writing their own stories in his world.

So many writers that I love have gotten to write stories in the Star Wars universe. Or the Star Trek universe. And the comic book characters! My God, the comic book characters. Every month, we see a new show, book, movie, mini-series, comic, or podcast spinning off from beloved franchises. And yes, they’re all looking for writers.

The chances of getting one of those jobs are slim, but not zero. I mean, the competition is fierce. But thousands of writers are, right now, writing fiction about characters they were huge fans of.

I wrote some truly terrible fanfic as a teenager, and it helped me learn to write better

Of course I did. You saw this coming, right? As a kid, I wrote some seriously terrible fanfic about X-Men and Sailor Moon. No, I will not be sharing it. Thank God, I was a teen before Wattpad was a thing, so all these stories were written out long form with pencil and paper. And they are now long decomposed in some landfill somewhere.

You know what? It taught me to be a better writer. It taught me the passion of sitting down and putting a story on the page. It taught me about descriptions and dialogue. I used to write some of this with a friend of mine, and we learned a whole lot by yes-anding each other. It also taught me what characters I was passionate about. What sort of characters I want to write. And yes, some of my published works were inspired by writing I did during my fanfic days.

No, I won’t tell you which ones.

But if you’ve read something I wrote and liked it, you can thank my fanfic writing. If for no other reason than that I got a lot of bad writing out of the way.

This is not the only writing we’re doing

While I was writing my X-Men fanfiction, I was also writing original stories. I know, crazy, right? This was when I was in junior high and middle school, so I actually spent a lot of time writing. On any random weekday, I might bang out an essay for English, play around with some fanfic, write a truly terrible poem about a kitten poster I had hanging up, then write a few pages in my moody gothic vampire novel. It was all bad writing, but it was writing.

And that’s the thing. Just because someone’s writing fanfic doesn’t mean that’s the only writing they’re doing. Or the only writing they’ll ever do. Justina Ireland writes a shit ton of Star Wars books, but she also writes novels purely of her own creation. And they’re fantastic! Looking down one’s nose at a person who writes fanfic is like suggesting that because someone drank a Coke, they’re going to die of dehydration. Surely they can’t also be drinking water.

It’s just fun to write

Finally, the biggest argument I’ll ever have in defense of writing is that it’s fun. Writing is fun. And it’s supposed to be fun.

To be a writer is to be passionately in love with writing. It gives us something that we can’t get anywhere else. And if writing fanfiction is fun for you, then do it!

I think we forget sometimes that not all writers are writing to be Novelists. I mean, I am. But some people just want to write as a hobby. And yes, I have made fun of that in the past. But there is honestly no shame in it.

I like drawing, painting, mixing my own teas, and crocheting. All of these things give me pleasure. They make life good. And I will never do any of them professionally. Why can’t writing be the same for someone?

So if you write fanfic, or you’ve ever written fanfic, don’t despair. It’s a valid form of writing that can teach you to be a better writer or just bring some joy to your life. Embrace it.

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Why On Pins and Needles Works

Launching on April 7th, On Pins and Needles by Kamden Cornell is possibly the most thorough dive into magical poppetry I’ve ever read.

I received an arc of this book from the publisher, and I am very glad I did. It was a fascinating read. If you’ve ever wanted to know more about making poppets for witchcraft or magical work, it’s a great book.

So today, let’s talk about why it works. If you’re a witch like me, I hope you add it to your TBR. If you’re writing a nonfiction book, let’s break this one down and talk about why it works.

Thorough overview

The first thing I like about On Pins and Needles is how thorough it was. Not so much in one part of poppetry, but in the practice as a whole.

The book contained a brief history of the craft. Though honestly, several books could be written just on the history alone. It talked about the many different supplies that can be used, from stuffing to scissors. It talked about the creation, the magic, the intention, and all the many ways this sort of working can be used.

This really gave a wide picture of poppet work, rather than diving down into the weeds with one specific part. Which is why this is such a good place for beginners to start.

Non judgemental explination of some dark material

This part might get a little touchy. But that’s why we’re talking about it.

Poppet work can be used for all sorts of magic. Healing, luck, love, prosperity, protection. They are so much more than the ‘evil voodoo doll’ people not in the know tend to picture.

Boy howdy, is that a shitty and racist stereotype, by the way.

However, like any magic, poppetry can be used for baneful magic. Now, I’m not going to openly admit to or discuss cursing anyone on the internet. But you’ll get no judgment from me if you choose to do so. And, you’ll get no judgment from Cornell, either. Instead, what you’ll find is a frank and open discussion of how to make a poppet for curses or baneful work, and some safety tips along the way. That was especially nice to see.

I really appreciated the lack of judgment on a subject that tends to get the ‘light and love’ crowd up in arms.

Inspiration!

Another thing I loved about On Pins and Needles was the examples of amazing creativity that can go into poppet work. Because honestly, you can use just about anything to make a poppet.

This is where craft supply hoarders like me shine! Want to make a paper doll? Go for it. Have a bunch of scrap fabric lying around? Use it! Do you like carving? Carve a doll! Got a bunch of those gems from a forgotten diamond painting? Use them to make a face on your doll!

This book had me itching to make a doll. Or, like twenty. I kept putting the book down to write out ideas. And honestly, that’s my favorite sort of nonfiction book. The sort that has me inspired to dive into the subject myself, and leaves me with a ton of new knowledge to do that with.

Real-life understanding

Finally, I want to shine a light on Cornell’s work with dolls. They make it clear through this book that they have done the work. They’ve made dolls, researched the topic, and seen results from it.

First-hand knowledge is always the best source for nonfiction work. Especially when it’s more of a how-to sort of book. And it’s clear that this author had that in spades.

Overall, I learned so much from On Pins and Needles. It was entertaining, creative, and bursting with inspiration. If you’re interested in all in poppet work, I cannot recommend it enough.

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Should writers be self-indulgent?

I was watching Micky Adkins a few weeks ago. I spend maybe too much time watching YouTube, but there we are. Micky’s great, you should check her out.

Of course, when I saw the title of this post, I had to watch it right away. (And by right away, I mean over the course of several days, because it was a three-hour-long video.) The title was, This BookTuber’s Vendetta Against Fanfiction Is Actually Pretty Sinister.

This video pissed me off so much that it actually inspired two different posts from me. Part two is coming soon. At some point, not sure when.

Look, I had Covid this week. Bear with me, everyone.

Now, Micky’s clear in this video that she is not a writer. So her opinions about this video are from a therapist’s perspective. But that’s okay, Micky. I am a writer. And I got you.

If three hours is too long a video for you, let me summarize it. It’s about another YouTube video from a channel I will not name, by a woman I will only call Hillary. Hillary doesn’t like fanfiction for many reasons. But the main reason for her hate seems to be that she finds fanfic to be self-indulgent. And Hillary thinks that self-indulgence is bad.

But is it? Let’s talk about it.

The dreaded Self-Insert

One of the biggest bugs up Hillary’s ass seems to be writers putting self-insert characters in their stories. You know, the sort of character that’s just clearly based on the author.

And that’s super cringy, right? Like, imagine if an author with a history of substance abuse issues and an absent father, who probably worried about being a good father, and lived in Maine, and was a teacher, wrote a lot of books about men with substance abuse issues who had terrible fathers, and lived in Maine, and taught. (Steven King)

Or like if a writer was a closeted lesbian who wanted to be a man her whole life, so she wrote about a closeted lesbian who wanted to be a man her whole life. (Louisa May Alcott)

Or if a writer got really into witchcraft and wrote a character who was really into witchcraft. (Me)

The point is that there’s actually nothing wrong with writing self-insert characters. I would argue that every character we write will have a little of ourselves in it. Even if we don’t mean to. We do it on purpose if we’re writing honestly. Our characters will reach for our favorite drinks. They’ll use our verbal idioms. We might even write them to look like us. That’s fine. So long as your characters are still as well-rounded as we can make these bags of bones, then go for it.

Oh no! I wrote about this super niche thing I like!

This is going to sound bitchy, but stick with me. We are not the precious little manic pixi individuals we think we are. Yes, every person is unique. Yes, every person is valuable as an individual and contains a whole universe of experiences that no one else can fully understand.

But we’re not that different. This is something that the internet has made clear to most of us. Any experience you’ve had, any joy or revolution, someone else has felt that too.

This means that if you write something that you really like, but you think it’s too niche for the rest of the world, you’re probably wrong. There’s probably someone out there, a lot of someones, who would really love to read your weird niche thing. So write about it, even if it seems self-indulgent.

I made art! Wait, I did it wrong?

Writing is art. We are artists, creating art. We are not producing a product.

There are no rules about art. There are techniques. There are widely accepted beliefs. And, I mean, of course, we have grammar rules. And spelling does count. But other than that, there are no rules.

You can write whatever you want. Your work doesn’t have to be super disciplined. It doesn’t have to follow traditional story structure. It doesn’t have to follow any agreed-upon structure. It can.

Art changes and evolves. What was considered standard a decade ago is passe now. And we as artists are allowed to shape how those changes come about by experimenting. Some might consider this part of our responsibility.

I’m a fan of what I wrote!

I know I’ve mentioned this before, but this seems like a good time to bring it up again. Writing a book takes so much time and work and passion and time and dedication and time. You have to love not just writing, but the writing that you specifically are doing. You have to be your story’s first and biggest fan. Because that love and devotion will get you through the days when it feels like you just can’t face the page. You just can’t take another round of editing.

This fandom will carry you through more than just the creation process if you let it. And that’s good, because you are going to have to champion your work to the world. You are going to have to be its biggest advocate. That’s easier if you, you know, like your book.

Wait, I’m actually a good writer?

So, what if you wrote something that’s super self-indulgent, but it turns out that it is, in fact, not good?

Maybe you wrote a really great sex scene, but it doesn’t really fit in your story.

Maybe you set a politician on fire in effigy, but that doesn’t make sense for your character to have done that.

Maybe you wrote this amazing description of the lush, gorgeous forest your character finds themselves in. Maybe you wrote three pages about it. In a row.

As you’re revising and editing your work, you’re going to work some of this stuff out for yourself. The longer you write, the more you edit your own work, the more you’ll see these things. Beta readers will also help you catch these moments.

Sometimes we have to kill our darlings. Sometimes we have to take out the things that don’t work for our story. Or kill off characters we’d rather live long lives.

Part of learning the craft of writing is learning what works and what doesn’t work. You know when it doesn’t work. You read it out loud, and it hurts your ears like an off-key melody. Or no matter how hard you try to make the storyline function, it won’t. Or you hate the character you’re supposed to love. Even if it hurts, you’ll know what needs to go.

These are all considerations for later drafts, though. When you’re rough-drafting, don’t worry about it. Throw everything in. Figure out what works later. Because, like you can’t see the whole painting in a brush stroke, you can’t tell if your self-indulgent scene works until the whole story is finished.

So, to sum it up, yes, your writing should be self-indulgent. You should write your story exactly how you want to write it. Give it the happiest ending. Write in that person you hate and evicerate them. Write smut. Craft a sappy love story that heals your specific wound. Skin a character.

Now look. I usually shy away from insulting other authors. And I’m not directly insulting Hillary. Even though sis went out of her way to insult a whole bunch of writers.

Writers who, as far as I can tell, are more prolific than she is. Whose work people like to read.

I’m not saying this to shame her or dunk on her. I am saying this because, for some reason I do not understand, she seems to be popular on YouTube. And I worry that some young writer might stumble upon her bullshit and feel bad about their writing. And if that’s you, let me say this with my whole chest.

Every single thing I have ever written has been very self-indulgent. I wrote Woven because I loved Tamora Pierce and wanted to write about thread crafts in magic. I wrote Quiet Apocalypse because I love haunted house stories and wanted to write about a modern witch. I’ve written and published nine books. I will, God willing, keep right on writing and publishing.

Hillary has published one. Do with that information what you will. And maybe, going forward, she should keep her eyes on her own work.

If you love what we do here and want to support Paper Beats World, please like and share this post. You can also support us financially on Ko-fi.

Want a free book? Check out Seeming, book one of Station 86.

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Maybe we should do emergency planning?

Here’s something you might or might not know about Mormons. Or, as they prefer to be called, members of the Church of Jesus Christ of Latter-day Saints. They are really big on emergency prepping. Specifically, keeping emergency food stores.

I was raised in the Church. And while my family didn’t go overboard, we did always have a little bit extra around. Extra batteries, extra canned veggies.

When I visited the homes of my church friends, they’d have basements full of canned or preserved food. Around here in Western PA, where the Mormon traditions blend with Appalachian common sense and know-how, lots of women garden and preserve produce. If you want a great deep dive about Mormons and emergency planning, check out this video from Alyssa Grenfell.

Now, I didn’t walk away from the church so much as I put on running shoes and took the hell off. But as I go through my healing journey, I’m learning that not everything I was taught as a child was bad. For instance, emergency prepping and food storage are sensible practices.

If a bad storm hits, you’re going to be happy you have some extra food, candles and batteries. But having a food storage also allows you to bless your community in times of great need. Like when people weren’t getting their SNAP benefits last November. It will also be a blessing to you if you lose your job or if a surprise gas bill wipes out half your paycheck. Then, of course, there’s the ever-present fear of ICE invading your community and making it unsafe to leave your home if your skin happens to be brown or black.

But Nicole, you might be saying, this is a writing and book blog. Food storage doesn’t have anything to do with ghosts, dragons or spaceships. Well, that’s where you’re wrong. Much like you can’t write your stories if ICE kills you, you can’t write your stories if you’re starving. So, let’s get started.

Make a plan

Everything starts with a plan. And for this project, we’re going to start with a list of things you’ll eventually buy for your emergency storage. This can include anything that you might need, but I recommend starting with food.

And I mean food that you won’t mind eating in case of an emergency. Food that your whole family will eat. For instance, most people have dried beans in their food storage. I don’t, because the Darling Husband wouldn’t eat them if we were starving.

I started by making a spreadsheet in Notion. But any spreadsheet software will work. Even a cheap notebook will work.

In the first column, write a list of things to buy for your emergency storage. Everyone’s needs are very different, so my list might not be the same as yours.

If you need a list of suggestions, there are a million online from people far smarter than me. However, one category that I think gets overlooked is spices.

Frankly, some people who look like me could also use a reminder that spices exist in everyday life. Cayenne, curry, cumin, red pepper. All of these are good additions that will be well-appreciated when and if the time comes. I also suggest salt, an extra pack of playing cards, and powdered milk.

Now that we have all of that in our spreadsheet, time to move into column two. In here, we’re going to write down how many of these items our family will need within a time frame. I suggest starting with one week and moving up from there as you grow your food storage.

Column three is where we’re eventually going to keep track of how many of these items we have on hand.

And finally, column four is where we’re going to keep track of expiration dates for these items, if they have them. All food goes bad eventually. So as you’re keeping your food storage and growing it, you’ll want to occasionally weed out things that are about to expire.

Start small

Now, I don’t want you to be overwhelmed. Because I have good news. Once you’ve made your spreadsheet, the hardest part is over. Now, you just have to start slowly getting the items on this list. You do not have to buy everything on your list all at once.

Let me say this louder. YOU DO NOT HAVE TO BUY EVERYTHING ON YOUR LIST ALL AT ONCE.

Nor do you need rows and rows of shelving units in your basement to hold all of this. I am just starting this process myself. Right now, my emergency storage looks like one bag of rice, some packets of instant mashed potatoes and a gallon of water, all tucked in a reusable shopping bag in the corner of my dining room.

Think of it like writing a novel. (See, I can always work things back to writing.) You’d never think to sit down and write an entire 50,000 + word rough draft in a day. You write a thousand words, or 500 words. The words add up until you finish your story.

Every time I go grocery shopping, I try to grab one or two things for the food storage. A tub of oatmeal here, a bag of rice there.

Slowly but surely, it all adds up.

And yes, it’s true that an emergency might happen at any time. But any amount of food storage is better than nothing. If tomorrow I lose my job, at least I know I’ve got a few meals’ worth of rice and mashed potatoes standing between me and my family going hungry.

Some bigger items you might consider

Now, if you happen to have some extra money, or if you’re the sort who likes to ask for practical gifts, I do have a list of suggestions. These are some bigger ticket items that will sure come in handy if things go south. I don’t actually have any of these items yet, but I have plans to get them.

– A battery-powered hot plate

– A good first aid kit

– A battery-powered lantern

– A blow-up mattress complete with extra bedding

– A generator

I am sure there are more things to be added to this list. I’d love to hear them in the comments.

Don’t be scared, be prepared

Remember, the point of all of this is not to live in fear. It is, in fact, the opposite.

Things happen in life. Things you never see coming. My God, things you never imagined living through just sneak up on you like fog at night.

Is having a well-stocked food storage going to protect you from everything that might go wrong? Of course not. But knowing that you’ve done what you can is a comfort. Whatever happens, at least you won’t go hungry. And at least you’ll be able to write about it.

I’d love to hear what you think. Is there a crucial item I’ve left off my emergency planning list? Let me know in the comments.

If you love what we do here and want to support Paper Beats World, please like and share this post. You can also support us financially on Ko-fi.

Want to start of the year with a free book? Check out Seeming, book one of Station 86.

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Fallow Years

I’m here! I’m alive!

I’d understand if you were a bit concerned. Normally, I’m nothing if not consistent. Since 2014, I’ve rarely, if ever missed a week posting without warning. Let alone two weeks in a row.

January was tough. It was tough for everyone. I’m not going to belabor that.

Today, I want to talk about something I’ve alluded to a few times so far. Something that I have some real deep feelings about. Something that maybe a lot of other writers have gone through, or will go through.

I don’t have a book coming out this year. Not a new book, not a relaunch. Nothing is coming out this year. And honestly, I don’t know when my next book will come out.

Right now I have three books on my desk. I have one book that’s on its second draft, but I’m pretty sure the whole thing needs rewriting at this point. The other two books are in rough draft phase. And by that, I mean that one book has fewer than two thousand words written, and the other is a page in my sketchbook that’s mostly just vibes.

As always, I’m of two minds about this. The artist part of me is perfectly happy. I’m listening to my muses. I’m giving myself the time and space to write something great. I’m enjoying the process. I’m creating something I can be really proud of, no matter how long it takes.

The self-loving part of myself is also happy with this. I’m leaning into a caretaker season in my life. The Darling Husband is still healing from his stroke, so a lot of my time and energy is spent on caring for the two of us.

Writing is still a big part of my day. It always will be, God willing. But I have other commitments.

All that being said, the ambitious part of me is losing her fucking mind. And she’s got a lot to say.

Publish or perish! People are going to forget about you! People are going to move on and stop caring! Put something new and fresh in front of your audience right now, or they’re going to jump ship.

I know this isn’t true. I know that fans will wait for the ending of a story. God knows I do.

My inner critic is never louder than my ambition monster. In some ways, that’s good. I don’t have a lot of fear in hitting publish. In other ways, it’s terrible. I have a ticking clock, insisting that I publish something, even if it isn’t something I’m totally proud of.

All that being said, how I feel about this situation doesn’t really matter. It’s still the situation I find myself in. So, what am I going to do about it?

Well, for starters, I’m writing. The only way out is through, after all. These fallow years won’t end until I, you know, finish a book. So that’s my main focus. By the end of 2026, I want to have finished two rough drafts, and possibly one second draft.

I’m also going to try to post more microfiction on Instagram. I tried to post something every day for a year, and failed. But I’m going to try again soon. Microfiction and poetry are great ways to sneak in a little bit of creativity, even on the busiest days. And I like putting them together in an aesthetically appealing way. So, I’m going to try to post something every day for 365 days. Don’t know yet when that’s starting, but look for it soon.

I’m focusing on promoting the books I already have out. And there are quite a few of those. Station 86, Woven, Quiet Apocalypse. I have work out there, guys. And if you haven’t read it, it’s new to you.

Finally, I’m writing some short stories set in the Station 86 world. That way, fans have something new for now, while waiting for the grand finale.

I don’t know how well any of this will work. I’ve published or republished something almost every year since Broken Patterns came out. So, I’ve literally never done this before.

If you’ve experienced this, I’d love some advice. Please drop it in the comments below.

For those of you who are fans of my books, and not just my yapping about books, I want to let you know what I’m working on. There are more books coming, I promise!

First, of course, is the final Station 86 book. I have written so many rough drafts that didn’t work for this book. That’s one of the reasons I don’t have anything to put out right now. It’s slow. I don’t think the story is ready yet. But when it’s done, I want it to be the best book I’ve ever written. Sennett and Godfrey deserve that.

The other book, and the one I’m working on right now, is a little different.

Those of you who’ve been around a while know that I used to write for a horror site called Haunted MTL. I did reviews and sometimes wrote short stories. I also wrote a horror sci-fi podcast called AA. Last year, after writing and producing two seasons, Haunted MTL shut down. I was heartbroken for many reasons, not the least of which was that it meant there would never be another season of AA. I just don’t have the time or resources to put out that sort of thing on my own.

But the last season left so many questions unanswered! And I want to answer them, you guys. So, I’m doing the only thing I know how to do. I’m making a novelization of AA.

It’s probably going to have a different title. Can you imagine trying to search for that at Barnes & Noble? But yes, all questions will be answered. If you were a fan of AA and have some burning questions in mind, please feel free to drop them in the comments.

That’s it for today. I promise to be around more consistently and have lots of good things planned. Remember that art gets us through our darkest times, and we can all make art. See you next week.

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