Today our Spring interview series continues with science fiction author Eric Klein.

Tell us about your book.

The One: a Cruise Through the Solar System  is a hard science fiction novel about the various colonies and a bit about the conditions there. In many ways it is designed to inspire colonization, and also to set up for book two.

It follows BJ Armstrong, a MacGyver like solutions expert on his journey around the solar system as part of a cruise he won. It is filled with homages to past sci-fi writers, and has many parts that were inspired by my own travels.

When did you realize that you were a writer?

This is a hard one, back in school I tried my hand at what would now be called fanfic for The Moon is a Harsh Mistress. I got about 3 chapters in on a sequel but dropped it. After that it was all writing chapters and articles for work, so it took almost 30 years for me to get back to writing fiction.

Do you have any books coming out this year?

Not clear yet, I  am working on 2 collaborations and don’t know when they will be done.

If readers are looking to connect with you, what’s the best way to do it?

Best way to connect with me is either via my Facebook author’s page or twitter. Both can be found on my site www.ericlkein.com.

What are you working on right now?

As I mentioned, I  am working on 2 collaborations. The first is the sequel to The One, and the second  is a more tongue in cheek tales of support staff that we are hoping to turn into a series.

Tell us about submitting your book. What was that like for you?

Actually that was quite easy, I had an in with the publisher (he is family) and it is a hybrid publishing house. So it was easy to submit it and then work out the details to prep it for publication.

What author would you say inspires you the most? 

I was inspired more by a generation than an author, but if I had to name one it would be Robert A. Heinlein. He took so many ideas and kind of created the field with them. Some better than others, but he was the first in so many I would have to say he inspired me.

Who is your current favorite author?

I have been going back to Spider Robinson a lot lately, so it would be him for his Callahan’s Crosstime Saloon series or Doc Smith for his Lensman series. I love the story telling techniques that they use.

What was your first favorite book as a child?

Where Wild Things Are was probably one of my first favorites after I graduated out of the Dr. Seuss books. But my favorite childhood book came later, and that was The Phantom Tollbooth.

What advice would you give yourself if you could go back to when you first started writing?

Keep writing, even if it is only a little bit a day. You can not edit or publish blank pages (yes I know that some people have done just that). And that first draft is just a more complete outline not a final book.

What would you consider the best thing you’ve ever done for your writing career.

Taking a wild chance. I noticed one of the scifi sites does a monthly “new books coming out” article almost every month. So I pushed my publisher to contact the article’s author. She never responded, but I was the first one listed for the month I launched. Got me a good start.

What would you consider the most fulfilling moment you’ve experienced as a writer?

I went back to my old high school and gave a series of talks to several classes of seniors. Was great to help inspire them and to show it is possible. Their questions and concerns were real and it made me feel good to pay it forward.

What book would you suggest to anyone who wants to write?

These days I am not sure that any writing book will be more useful than the tools you use to write. That said, Elements of Style would be a must. There are so many little things (like spelling out numbers) that you need to know to do a good book.

Check out Eric’s book, The One, here.

Continuing our Spring Author Interview series, please welcome Geoff Nelder, author of Suppose We. Full disclosure, I’m in the middle of reading this right now. It’s pretty awesome. Review to come soon. Please enjoy the interview.

SUPPOSE WE – the enigmatic title of a spaceship that became the title of the work-in-progess novella but the critique group said—as if they were one angry person—“Nelder, don’t you dare change the title. We thought it stupid at first but have fallen in love with it.”

1. Tell us about your book.

SUPPOSE WE is a science fiction novella, the first in the Flying Crooked series. It might be the only science fiction book written by a vegan (for over 40 years. I’m no jump-on-a-bandwagon fashionista) with a vegan main character and set on a vegan planet. What? How can a planet be vegan you ask? The planet has no predators larger than insects. Yes, I’ve done the ecosystem schematics: I used to teach ecology and environmental science. Not all the characters are vegan, creating juicy debate.

The ship crashlands on a faraway planet. Sadly the natives are a million years ahead of Earth, so ignore the humans. How do they get the help they need, survive the strange planet and discover what is in the mission’s secret payload?

SUPPOSE WE was unleashed on the vegan and non-vegan public on May 20^th 2019 as an ebook (B07RQW5LHR) and paperback (ISBN 978-0997554939)

Universal link for Amazon Kindle https://mybook.to/SupposeWe

2. When did you realize that you were a writer?

In 1962 at the age of 15, I wrote skits for school performances. One of my gags was stolen by the Bishop of Gloucester and he repeated it on BBC radio years later. I didn’t get any credit except that gold epiphany: I knew I could write well enough for a bishop to plunder my work! If you want to see that joke send me an email. I could write it here but it takes half a page and I don’t want to be responsible for you choking and spluttering your cornflakes all over your screen.

3. Do you have any books coming out this year?

Besides SUPPOSE WE – have you bought it yet? –its sequel FALLING UP will be published this year. It’s also a bit surreal – the title kind of says it all.

4. How can readers connect with you?

   Contact form on my website https://geoffnelder.com

Twitter @geoffnelder

Facebook https://www.facebook.com/AriaTrilogy

5. What are you working on right now?

FALLING UP and you’re stopping me. I have deadlines you know. Lines that are dead, or dying.

6. What author inspires you the most?

Oh that’s hard. What time is it? Ah, before lunch if I need inspiration I read a page or two of anything by Tibor Fischer, especially The Thought Gang, or Collector Collector. Between lunch and tea, I turn to A.L Kennedy – she’s probably the best short story writer ever. After tea I read something by Idries Shah such as The Pleasantries of the Incredible. They’re kind of koans except they’re not Asian but Turkish-ish.

7. Who is your current favourite author?

Claire North eg her The First Fifteen Lives of Harry August. She’s my fave because she writes like me, or I like her.

8. What was your first favourite book as a child?

How to be a spy by Baden Powell.

9. What advice would you give yourself if you could go back to when you first started writing?

The fashionable answer is to say give up, but not me. Join a critique group or two. I belong to the BSFA (British Science Fiction Association) critique group. Alternatively you should cough up the funds to employ a good editor before submitting anything to publishers or agents.

10. What was the best thing you’ve ever done for your writing career?

Career? Haha. Anyway… 7 years ago I went to a writing retreat on Greece. Absolutely marvellous. Time and scenery to relax and write, write, write. Meet arty types and absorb the Mediterranean. I go every year for two weeks if my wife can’t find a good enough reason to stop me.

11. What would you consider the most fulfilling moment you’ve experienced as a writer?

The day my first novel came out and a month later at my first book signing. Yes, every publication day is great, but nothing quite beats the first one. I say this even though that humorous thriller, Escaping Reality, was riddled with typos and OTT sex. It’s been cleaned up a bit since. A contender for best moment is when my grandkids realise that their Pop is a writer. They tell their infant teachers who then want me to read to the kids. Umm. Okay so now I’ve written a few kids stories so that the police aren’t called if I read my novels to a class of ten year olds!

12. What book would you suggest to anyone who wants to write?

Many writers would say Stephen King’s inspirational On Writing, or David Lodge’s clever tome, The Art of Fiction. However, everyone should really read How to Win Short Story Competitions by… guess who? Yes, I co-wrote it with Dave Haslett. We’re both experienced competition judges. ISBN 978-1719861663 ASIN B07GS36Y1N

Is that it? Can I get back to my anniversary and SUPPOSE WE publishing celebration now? Hey, grandkids, that’s my laptop not your games console…

Continuing our Spring Interview Series, here’s Debbie De Louise, author of Sea Scope. Enjoy.

Tell us about your book.

Sea Scope is a psychological mystery featuring Sarah Collins, a children’s book illustrator, who is invited back to her childhood home in South Carolina by her aunt after her brother’s death. Facing some difficulties in her marriage, she accepts the invitation and travels there with her friend. Along the way and at Sea Scope, the Inn where she lived as a child, she starts receiving strange messages from someone pretending to be her brother Glen. The book moves back and forth in time to the summer Sarah and Glen, as kids, found a body of an inn guest near a lighthouse. Sarah, now grown and reunited with people from twenty years ago including the boy who kissed her for the first time, discovers some clues in her childhood diary and her aunt’s art studio about who might be sending her messages and what really happened that long ago summer at Sea Scope. The book also contains trivia and photos related to lighthouses and lighthouse lore.

When did you realize that you were a writer?

I’ve been writing since I was a child, but I didn’t consider myself a writer until I began publishing articles for pet magazines and then a short story in a mystery anthology, followed by my first book, Cloudy Rainbow, that I self-published in 2008 that was recently reprinted by my publisher. I’ve been publishing books regularly since 2015 and now have seven novels including the four books of my Cobble Cove mystery series.

Do you have any books coming out this year?

Not yet, but I have an unpublished first book of a proposed cozy mystery series that I’m querying to agents, and I also have two unfinished mysteries that I hope to finish writing soon.

If readers are looking to connect with you, what’s the best way to do it?

I have a blog and an author newsletter, both of which can be subscribed to through my website at https://debbiedelouise.com. I’m also on Facebook and Twitter and have an Amazon author page. Here are all my links:

Facebook: https://www.facebook.com/debbie.delouise.author/

Twitter: https://twitter.com/Deblibrarian

Goodreads: https://www.goodreads.com/author/show/2750133.Debbie_De_Louise

Amazon Author Page: http://amzn.to/2bIHdaQ

Bookbub: https://www.bookbub.com/profile/debbie-de-louise

What are you working on right now?

I just returned from a writer’s conference in St. Louis, so I’m taking a break while I promote my new release, but I hope to get back to my works-in-progress soon.

Tell us about submitting your book. What was that like for you?

Well, I’ve been publishing with Solstice Publishing for nearly three years now, but I found out about another publisher through an author whom I interviewed on my blog and submitted Sea Scope to them. I’m still writing for Solstice, but I thought I’d like to branch out a bit. In addition to ebook and paperback copies, Creativia has published Sea Scope in large type and also plans to publish it in audio and hardcover. I think it’s nice to have a variety of formats available to readers. I’m also very pleased with their cover. I’ve had lots of compliments on it.

What author would you say inspires you the most? 

That’s a tough question. I’m inspired by many authors. If I had to choose one, it might be Nora Roberts because, not only is she prolific, but she writes her JD Robb mystery series along with romantic suspense standalones, and I also enjoy writing series as well as standalone mysteries.

Who is your current favorite author?

I like to read a variety of authors. Working in a library, I have access to a large number of books. Some of my favorite authors include Nora Roberts, Mary Higgins Clark, and Sandra Brown. I’ve also enjoyed books by Jo Jo Moyes, Ruth Ware, Kimberly McCreight, Audrey Niffenegger, and Karen Robards, There are many more including Indie authors such as Lisa Diaz Meyer, JP Ratto, James Cudney V, and so many others.

What was your first favorite book as a child?

The book that had the most influence on me when I was young was the Winter People by Phyllis Whitney that one of my brothers gave me as a Christmas present when I was 11. After that, I read all of her books and other romantic suspense authors of the time such as Victoria Holt.

What advice would you give yourself if you could go back to when you first started writing?

I think I would’ve taken more time to query agents before signing with an online publisher. I also wouldn’t have stopped writing for so many years after I self-published my first book.

What would you consider the best thing you’ve ever done for your writing career?

Joining professional writing organizations including Sisters-in-Crime, the Cat Writers’ Association, the Long Island Author’s Group, and International Thriller Writers and also networking with other authors both online and in person.

What would you consider the most fulfilling moment you’ve experienced as a writer?

Seeing my first published book in print form.

What book would you suggest to anyone who wants to write?

Writer’s Market in print and online. It’s also available in most libraries. It features listings of publishers, writing tips, and other valuable information for writers and is updated annually.

PURCHASE LINKS FOR SEA SCOPE: Amazon.com

Paperback: https://amzn.to/2GTQonm

Large Type: https://amzn.to/2vuDVQe

Kindle eBook and Kindle Unlimited: https://amzn.to/2VenMOi

Continuing in our author interview series, today we’re hosting Mark McQuillen. Please enjoy.

Tell us about your book.

Well, actually there are 12 of them that chronicle Malices journey from Archvillianess to Queen of the Valkyrie. It’s a story of love, redemption, justice and more importantly to the character herself revenge.

When did you realize that you were a writer?

Since I was about 8, I wrote little stories for my friends, etc. I didn’t start seriously writing until 2015 when I wrote the first Valkyrie Novella.

Do you have any books coming out this year?

Hopefully three, the two rewrites of the first two Valkyrie Novellas and Valkyrie 4.

If readers are looking to connect with you, what’s the best way to do it?

Stalker Links

⏩Twitter
https://twitter.com/mmcquillen44
⏩Goodreads
https://www.goodreads.com/author/show/14240604.Mark_McQuillen
⏩Facebook Page
https://www.facebook.com/MarkMcQuillenMadhouse/
⏩Facebook Author Group   https://www.facebook.com/groups/1042538899090816/
⏩Amazon Author Page
http://amzn.to/2cs5see
⏩Website
http://mmcquillen44.wixsite.com/themadhouse
#TheBlackRose
https://www.facebook.com/groups/1263890940363463/
#ValkyrieTakeovers
https://www.facebook.com/groups/2333535150222791

What are you working on right now?

A prequel story part of Malice’s origin story called “Into the Shadowlands”

Tell us about submitting your book. What was that like for you?

Well I’m a self-published writer it was kind of daunting pushing that submit button on Amazon the first time

What author would you say inspires you the most?

George RR Martin, he spent years decades in obscurity before writing GOT. He’s living proof that if you work at writing long enough someone will notice you.

Who is your current favorite author?

Neil Gaiman

What was your first favorite book as a child?

The Hobbit, I was 6.

What advice would you give yourself if you could go back to when you first started writing?

Never give up just write something every day and eventually you’ll reach your goal.

What would you consider the best thing you’ve ever done for your writing career.

Just getting through the first novella was quite the accomplishment at least for me.

What would you consider the most fulfilling moment you’ve experienced as a writer?

Winning Best Fantasy and Best Epic Fantasy Awards back to back at the Virtual Fantasy Faire in 2017-2018.

What book would you suggest to anyone who wants to write?

I really haven’t ever read any writing books. I’m self-taught. But as far as books in the genre that you are interested in writing in I would suggest you read every one that you can get your hands on.

 

Hey, guys. Today we have an interview with Lizzy Stevens, author of a really fantastic amount of books. She also happens to be the CEO of Solstice Publishing. Enjoy.

Tell us about your book.

 My latest book is “Ravencrest book two Preparing for Battle” Book one is “Ravencrest book one Lucinda’s story” in book two Lucinda has learned how to be the head of the Ravencrest family. This was all kind of thrown on her. She didn’t even know she was a witch. After finding out she is a witch she learns that she has to take the family into the battle of a lifetime and lives will be lost. The more she learns about this battle she finds out that a previous battle with this clan is what killed her father all those years ago. She had to deal with a lot in book two.

When did you realize that you were a writer?

I think I have always wanted to be a writer. I can remember being young and always reading. My older sister would make fun of me and call me a nerd LOL I always had my head in a book. As I got older, I wanted to tell the stories running around in my head. So, I took all the English classes in high school. I took the creative writing classes. I was that kid LOL I always wanted to write.

Do you have any books coming out this year?

I have released two so far this year.

“Locked In A Castle”

And

“Ravencrest book Two Preparing For Battle”

I’m sure there will be many more from me. 

If readers are looking to connect with you, what’s the best way to do it?

I love Twitter. You can find me there almost every day.  @lizzystevens123

https://twitter.com/LizzyStevens123

 

What are you working on right now?

My mind never stops LOL I just did a couple contest so that took me away from my next book but they were fun to do. Now I am onto my next one. Not sure which one I’m going to start though. I have a couple different ones that I’m thinking over. We’ll see which one wins LOL

Tell us about submitting your book. What was that like for you?

Oh it was for sure nerve wrecking. I mean I had never done anything like that before. I had no idea what I was doing LOL Then you submit and you get told it’s not really what they are looking for. But you keep trying and keep working on it. Then you find the publishers that do want your writing. I signed with one company then I kept writing. I signed with two others. Then I decided to become a publisher. So now I write my own and help others fulfill their dream.

What author would you say inspires you the most? 

There are way too many. Going way back. I loved Winnie the Pooh as a child. So for sure A.A. Milne, also Dr. Seuss. Then as I grew I loved the Sweet Valley High books by Francine Pascal. Then we move into the older days. I loved Stephen King books. My grandmother and I would take turns checking them out at the library. She would read one and give it to me and I would read one and give it to her. So that whole experience probably helped my writing along. I also love Nicholas Sparks, Janette Oke, Cassandra Clair, All these authors are amazing. I could go on and on. I told you there were too many for me to name LOL  

Who is your current favorite author?

I have too many to list a favorite. The above question pretty much says a lot.

What was your first favorite book as a child?

Winnie the Pooh

What advice would you give yourself if you could go back to when you first started writing?

Just do the best that you can.

What would you consider the best thing you’ve ever done for your writing career.

I don’t know if it was the best for my career, but the best thing for me was writing a book with my kids. It was really fun. “Don’t Make A Wish” me and Steve, my husband, we wrote that with the boys. We all sat in the living room. I had a notebook in hand and we hammered out the story. Then I went to the computer and wrote it. That was so much fun for me.

What would you consider the most fulfilling moment you’ve experienced as a writer?

I enjoy making people happy. If a reader likes my book after reading it then that is great.

 

What book would you suggest to anyone who wants to write?

I would say if somebody wants to write then my advice would be to do it. I wouldn’t suggest a book. I would suggest just do it. Throw out all thoughts that you can’t and sit down and start writing.

 

Of course, in addition to being an author, you’re also the CEO of the publishing company Solstice Publishing. What can you tell us about working in Publishing?

I love the publishing industry. It’s not an easy job. But books are my passion. I love to help authors make their dreams come true.

 

What’s your favorite part of being in the publishing business?

Interacting with everyone.

 

If someone wants to submit to Solstice Publishing, what should they do?

Stop by our website and read the guidelines all the way through before submitting. www.solsticepublishing.com

 

Can you tell us if you’re looking for anything in particular right now? What sort of book would you be most excited to see?

We want to see original stories. Don’t submit your book by saying it is like and name something else that might be well known.  That story has already been told. We want to know what you wrote. What is your story about.

Are you listening to Ditch Diggers yet? If you’re not, you totally should be. It is the number one reason I’m laughing in public without explanation.

Earlier this week I talked to you about this episode, and how it helped me get over feeling like I’m different from other authors who are still paying their dues.

Another thing discussed during that episode was a theory that I’d never really thought of before. It’s not so much about writing, but more about life in general.

All credit for this thought-provoking theory goes to Matt Wallace. He said that we need to prioritize things before they become triage situations.

If that’s not clear, let me break it down for you. Take care of something before it becomes an emergency.

You know how sometimes you read something, and your brain just sort of explodes with reactions? I had so many with this one! What am I ignoring that might be a triage situation? Should I be planning more for things that might happen? Am I doing enough?

Are any of us ever doing enough?

I mean, that’s the real question. Are we ever really doing enough? Can we ever do enough?

The short answer is no. The long answer is also no.

There are too many things that could happen. You could get sick, or a loved one. You could get hit by a bus. You could get laid off.

Good things can happen too. You can get a great opportunity, but it comes with a short deadline.

That isn’t to say we can’t do anything. We can take care of ourselves before we end up in the hospital. We can work diligently before deadlines loom.

Yeah, sometimes we’re still going to end up in triage. But we can lower the chances.

Station 86 is shocked when a Khloe assassin begins killing members of the all powerful council. Officer Sennett Montgomery and Councilman Godfrey Anders swear to find the assassin after Godfrey’s wife is falsely accused. But the killer, and the council itself, are not what they seem. Neither, as it turns out, is Sennett’s daughter. Then, Sennett, Godfrey and the rest of Station 86 are trying to put their society back in order after the Core attack. Then a mysterious ship from a dying station arrives, bringing artificially intelligent robotic, murderous dogs. Godfrey, Mason and April must get to the hospital safely, while Sennett is trying to protect Marshal’s Joy and Howard. But the AI dogs are nothing compared to the terrors they left behind on their own station.

Get your copy now.

I’ve probably said this before but getting published is not the end of the road. It’s not the shiny, beautiful land of flowing money and praise that I, at least, always thought it would be. I’m going to be really honest with you all today.

I was published in 2016. My books are not best sellers. I am not making money from them. I still have a full-time day job.

Blast of cold water for some of you, who might not be published yet. Totally realistic position for some of you who are published.

That’s the way of things. Getting published is not the pot of gold, it’s one of many steps on the path. It’s a milestone, sure. But it’s not the end.

And yet, I forever think that this can’t possibly apply to me. Sure, other people are writing and publishing in obscurity, but there’s something wrong with me. Not them, just me. I’m a terrible writer, that’s it. I’m just shitty, and that’s why I’m failing.

I mean, sure, Elizabeth Gilbert was still working until she published Eat Pray Love, which was her third novel. I know, JK Rowling submitted Harry Potter to everyone and their mother before getting published. I know that Stephen King wrote Carrie while working full time as a writer and collected his share of rejections.

But that’s not me. I must be different. I must be the only one failing like this.

Then, as usual, the universe collides to remind me of what I should already know. This time, the universe decided to be kind. The lesson I needed came in the form of two podcasts, which just happened to be on my list to listen to back to back.

The first was this episode of Ditch Diggers

The second was this episode of Anne Kroaker, writing coach.

And they’re both talking about the same thing. What matters most, if you want to succeed in anything, is persistence. It’s not your work. No matter what you do someone who is way worse than you is succeeding. It’s not who you know, though that can help. It’s not anything else but how many times are you willing to try.

I forget sometimes, and maybe you do too, that there are tiers to succeeding. For writing, those tiers are such.

Write a book.

Edit a book and get it to a completed draft.

Find an editor/publisher.

Get the book published.

Sell the book.

Do that enough times to quit my job and travel the country full time in an RV.

I sometimes forget that I’m on step four, and that’s the longest step! It’s also a step that most people never get to. As I said, there’s a tier system working here. Most people who want to write a book never do. Most people who do write a book never finish it. Most people who do finish their book don’t get it published. Most people who do get published don’t make enough money to support themselves.

I don’t know how to get to that last tier. But I know I won’t get there if I stop. Besides, I’m going to keep right on writing anyway.

Might as well keep going.

Station 86 is shocked when a Khloe assassin begins killing members of the all powerful council. Officer Sennett Montgomery and Councilman Godfrey Anders swear to find the assassin after Godfrey’s wife is falsely accused. But the killer, and the council itself, are not what they seem. Neither, as it turns out, is Sennett’s daughter. Then, Sennett, Godfrey and the rest of Station 86 are trying to put their society back in order after the Core attack. Then a mysterious ship from a dying station arrives, bringing artificially intelligent robotic, murderous dogs. Godfrey, Mason and April must get to the hospital safely, while Sennett is trying to protect Marshal’s Joy and Howard. But the AI dogs are nothing compared to the terrors they left behind on their own station.

Get your copy now.

If you’re just joining us, this is day two of my explanation of why I left The Church of Jesus Christ of Latter Day Saints.

Standard disclaimer: I have nothing against the Mormon church. I don’t rail against them, nor do I have anything against anyone who is Mormon. This is just why I decided to leave.

I want to thank Plamondon, the author behind Ah, Mince. Your bravery in writing your GUM (growing up Mormon) series is what encouraged me to write this.

And now, for part two.

Women and men have very specific roles in the Mormon church. A man is the head of the household. He is the provider, the voice of the church within the house. He is meant to be the guidance that his children and wife need. A woman is the comfort of the home. Her role is to raise the children, care for the home, and be the spiritual center of the house. My impression of a Mormon mom was always kind of like a Stepford wife. Their homes were always in good order, they cooked homemade dinners every night. There were no playing cards in their homes because Mormon’s don’t believe in them. Mormon moms braided their daughter’s hair every morning, woke them with a song. They volunteered to work with the Young Women’s group, and they baked cookies all the time. Cookies from scratch, not from a packet.

My mom tried so damn hard to be that. Our house was always picture perfect. She cooked almost every night, even if it was microwaved Salisbury steaks. She worked herself half to death to conform to the kind of mother she thought I deserved, as a Mormon kid. But she was trying to keep up with stay at home moms. At most, part-time working moms. That was an unrealistic standard to reach for.

Here’s a really high standard my mom taught me as a child that most of my friend’s moms didn’t have. My mom has always been accepting of homosexuality and anyone on the LGBT spectrum. Love is love, that’s what my mom taught me. She didn’t care who I brought home, so long as that person treated me right.

Fun fact, Mormons don’t believe in gay marriage. I’ve always had a problem with that. But who was I, after all, to question the church?

Finally, there was one thing I lived with my whole time as a Mormon that impacted me more than anything else. Warning, this is totally selfish. I don’t care.

I was consistently pitied for being the daughter of a single mom. You remember I was talking about being too nervous to ask for blessings from my friend’s dads? I didn’t really need to ask, they were offered. Other moms were always making sure that I had a ride to church events, and that I was included in every single thing. Every year a young woman of the church is expected to have a Personal Progress Project. I was constantly offered help with mine. One mom even asked if her husband could take me to the father-daughter event since her own daughter would be out of town.

I’d said not a single word to this man my entire damn life.

I’m sure these women didn’t mean to make me feel pitied. They were trying to help me because they felt that I was missing something. In doing so, they reminded me constantly of what I was missing.

Despite all of this, I still considered myself a good Mormon. At least, I wanted to be. I desperately wanted to be. I was sure, as I assume most children are, that I was the one who was wrong. The Church was right. Then I did something that really drove a wedge in my relationship with the church.

I had a baby.

The church is totally pro-baby. But they’re not pro getting pregnant outside of wedlock at seventeen. I mean, who is really? That’s not a goal for most people, at least it wasn’t for me. I had to go and speak with our Bishop, and a panel of older men in the church. And I have to say, if you’re going to leave the teaching of young girls to the women, maybe you should let them discipline them, too.

There was a discussion about having me excommunicated. Now, I want to make it clear that this doesn’t mean the same thing as with other churches. Being excommunicated, as it was explained to me, meant that I would then be able to be re-baptized.

Again, they were trying to be kind.

But that really was the beginning of the end. That was when I realized something profound.

Maybe, if I don’t agree with some of the basic foundations of the church, it might not be the church for me. Maybe it’s not wrong, and I’m not wrong, but we’re wrong for each other.

It didn’t come down to some dramatic event. I didn’t damn them and storm out of the building. I just stopped going. I didn’t feel like I really owe anyone an explanation, so I didn’t give one.

There are lots of good things about being Mormon. If you’ve ever been around one, or a whole group, you know they’re scary nice people. That’s on purpose. You’re taught as a Mormon that your behavior should always be kind. You are a servant of the lord in everything you do. Mormons are taught to be hard workers, thrifty and diligent. They don’t drink alcohol or caffeine. They don’t smoke. And family always comes first.

That’s all fine, and I can’t find fault with it. But if you don’t fit into a specific mold, you’re going to suffer. I tried for a long time to fit into that mold. But it was just never going to work. And I’m done trying.

Which isn’t to say it was easy. Being a part of a church like that is like being part of a massive community. There’s a language that goes along with it, a way of speaking. I still feel that loss, even though I don’t see myself ever going back. But it’s hard not to feel a bit lost. Unfortunately, there’s not a chapter of my current faith anywhere near here. There are lots of great online communities, though, and I take a lot of comfort in that.

I do also want to say that while I did lose faith in the church, my faith in God never wavered. If anything, that’s gotten stronger through my life. So many people I talk to, their faith and their church are so intertwined that when they lose one, they lose the other. That wasn’t how it was for me.

Thank you for tolerating this rather long, sad story. I hope that, if you’ve ever gone through something like this, that you know you’re not alone. Faith is a very personal experience, and what was the right path for me may not be the right one for you.

I just hope you find your own path.

It took me a long time to write this post. Honestly, even while I’m writing it now, I’m trying to think of reasons not to. It’s really easy to think of reasons not to do something you’re scared of.

It struck me as self-indulgent, talking about why I left the church of my childhood. Perhaps even a little mean spirited. And, worst of all, I wonder if anyone is really going to care about this. I wonder if it’s just wasting time, mine and yours. This is a blog, sure, but it isn’t a personal blog. I’m not on here blogging about the dream I had last night or the wonderful time I had at the Science Center last week. (We did go to the Science Center. It was a great time.)

Did I want to talk about leaving the church? Of course, I did. If something hurts me, makes me happy, makes me feel any emotion at all, my first instinct is to get that feeling into words and share it. That’s not always an instinct I need to listen to.

I’d almost decided to just not do it. Then, while I was scrolling through Instagram, I found a comic by a wonderful artist who writes a comic called Ah, Mince. Here’s a link to her site, please check her out. She wrote a whole series about growing up in the Mormon church, and what drove her to leave. It’s called GUM. (Growing up Mormon.)

This is not her normal bag. She normally writes funny material. That’s why I started following her. But this series, it really hit me between the eyes.

Because, even though she was talking about her own experience, and it was wildly different from mine, it didn’t feel that different. It felt like she understood what I had gone through.

And that meant a lot to me. Leaving a religion you grew up in is an isolating experience. So, finding someone else who knows what that feels like, is like finding a light in a dark tunnel. And I decided that if I could be that for someone else, even one person, that was worth a post.

Now, I’m not writing any of this to encourage any Morman to leave the church. I’m not encouraging anyone to leave their church. I would say except Scientologists, but that’s not really a religion. I only want to share with you what made me leave, and how it’s changed how I see the world.

I was a third generation Mormon. Or, as I was taught, I was a member of the Church of Jesus Christ of Latter-Day Saints. My grandmother joined the church when she was a young mother. She was raised Catholic. Her brother and his whole family are still Catholic. So if anyone knows what I went through after leaving the church, it’s her.

Not sure why I’ve never talked to her about that. Maybe it’s because I’ve never talked to her about leaving the church.

I don’t really know the details of why Grandma left the Catholic church. Even if I did, that’s not my story to tell. It should suffice to say that she had good reasons for joining the Mormon church. And, they did wonderful things for her.

The church gave her a home and a family when she needed one. They helped her quit some bad habits she would rather I didn’t talk about here. I have never said, and will never say, that the church didn’t do great things for my grandma. I’m happy about that. She’s still a devout member of the church, and happy about that, too.

She raised all six of her kids in the church. They all consider themselves Mormon still, I think. It has a pretty high success rate.

As a kid, my mom didn’t take me to church. I’m pretty sure she had good reasons not to. She was working, or she’d worked the night before and was now justifiably exhausted. Maybe she just didn’t want to. Whatever the reason, I always attended church with my grandma.

When I was little, it wasn’t all that bad. I have vivid memories of coloring with wind up crayons that I wasn’t allowed to use any other time. Grandma taught me to fold a handkerchief so that it became two babies in a hammock. After Sacrament meeting, I would go to Primary and she would go to Relief Society. Then, we’d go home and she’d make us lunch. Those Sundays at her house are some of the strongest memories I have of my childhood. We didn’t watch tv on Sundays, so I would either play with my toys or read Calvin and Hobbs until my mom came to pick me up.

Even as I got older, and I was no longer allowed to color during Sacrament, it still wasn’t that bad. It was boring, but the classes after were fun. I had friends, and they were all in my class. Then one day, without a lot of warning, I was moved to a different class from my friends. You see, all of my friends were boys, and I was now in the girl’s class. That was my first sigh, looking back, that I might have a little bit of a problem.

As a teenager, I really wanted to be a good Mormon. I’ve seen Saturday’s Warriors literally over 100 times. There are three different Mormon magazines, I got them all. I read them, too. I subscribed to Ensign right up until the day I left the church. I was the secretary of my young women’s group. I went to the Young Women’s Summer camp and all of the youth group events. I was baptized in the church and received a Patriarchal Blessing. I’ve been inside the Temple in DC many times. I still consider it one of the most beautiful buildings I’ve ever seen in real life. (If you’re wondering, Mormons have churches called Wards that everyone is welcome to. They also have Temples, that you have to be a member and have a temple recommend to go to.)

The problem was, I just kept running into things I didn’t agree with about the Church. Like, some pretty major disagreements.

If you’re a man, and a Mormon, you are considered a member of the Priesthood. Members of the Priesthood are able to do things within the Church that other’s can’t. One that came up time and time again was a Priesthood holder’s ability to give a blessing.

Now, let me explain something about blessings in the Mormon faith. They were part of a regular Mormon’s kid’s life. A blessing is a prayer said on your behalf by a member of the Priesthood. If you were sick, or had a big test coming up, or just feeling kind of shitty, you asked your dad for a blessing. Your dad, or your big brother, or your uncle. Because women can’t hold the Priesthood. You can see how that put me at a disadvantage as a child of a single mom. All my uncles lived out of state. If I needed a blessing, I had to ask one of my friend’s dads. That was awkward.

This is getting a little long. I’m going to cut off here and pick it up on Friday. See you then.

Let’s talk about anger today. Not because any of us are particularly angry. I’m frequently angry, about any number of things both personal and universal. But I’m no more angry today than I ever am.

But it’s best to talk about anger when you’re not angry. Most people don’t think clearly when we’re angry. We do stupid shit when we’re angry. We yell at people we love. We drive too fast, drink too much, lose our temper. We make monsters of ourselves.

That’s the assumption, at least. We assume that anger boils over and scalds. We assume it ruins lives and that it is poisonous.

I don’t think that’s right. I think anger is an emotion, a state that we cannot judge because we don’t have any control over it. The pain of anger comes only if we react to it poorly.

Anger is good.

At least, honest anger is good. It shows us points of pain. Think of what makes you angry. Do you feel anger when you hear of people persecuted against? What about childhood hunger or abandoned animals? That’s good if you feel anger at that. How could you call yourself human if you didn’t?

Honest anger is a flag you plant to show you what you are not comfortable with. And this is all personal. I am angry about any manner of situations that might seem petty or small, but they cause me anger and so I must pay attention. Even if someone else might consider it a minor inconvenience, or even perfectly alright, my emotion is different. My emotion is valid. And so is yours.

That is not to say that anger is permission to do harm. No emotion gives permission for that. But it does give you permission to set boundaries.

No, I do not want to go there.

No, I will not do that for you.

No, I will not be that.

This is what anger tells us when we should say no.

But we must take care because while anger is honest, other emotions aren’t. Fear, like the coward it is, will wear anger’s face. So will exhaustion. These are emotions that we associate with weakness, and so we shun them if we can. We say it’s anger, because anger, for all we claim to hate it, is powerful.

This is crucial to recognize in ourselves. When you have time today, make a list of the things that spark anger in yourself. Think as big or as small as you want. People who don’t use their turn signal all the way to racists bearing tiki torches. Get it all down. Do you see a pattern?

Now that you understand what sparks anger in you, consider what sparks anger in your main character. Are they many of the same things or are they wildly different? Free write for ten minutes about how you both react to that anger. If you want, post your response below.

Station 86 is shocked when a Khloe assassin begins killing members of the all powerful council. Officer Sennett Montgomery and Councilman Godfrey Anders swear to find the assassin after Godfrey’s wife is falsely accused. But the killer, and the council itself, are not what they seem. Neither, as it turns out, is Sennett’s daughter.

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